Lifetime Dating

UnREAL on Lifetime

2015.06.05 11:29 popkvlt UnREAL on Lifetime

A subreddit for the Lifetime series UnREAL. A (fictional) behind-the-scenes look at the chaos surrounding the production of a dating competition show, with a focus on the morally questionable behavior of top producer Rachel and her boss Quinn.
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2019.11.23 14:59 YumYumforDumDum LifetimeRecipes

Tried and true recipes that are easy to make and delicious to eat. No more tearing out recipes from magazines or keeping recipe cards, this Lifetime Recipes community has all the recipes you’ll ever need and adding new ones all the time. Some of my favorites are side dishes that compliment any protein that you might be serving. Also, I’ve added recipes from the many cooking classes I’ve attended. On my website Yum Yum for Dum Dum there are over 800+ recipes dating all the way back to the 1960’s!
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2011.03.06 06:13 New York City Seddit Lair

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2020.11.28 02:26 Ngthatsme hey all 👋. Thanks for all your previous support and comments about the timeblindness application I made! To give back I'm offering 10x free Lifetime accounts 🎁

Hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving!
I've been working hard on improving my timeblindness application based on your previous feedback (thank you it's been my source of motivation), and am currently doing a competition to help raise some awareness around it.
I'm giving away 10x FREE Lifetime accounts, details here on Twitter. Didn't want this sub to miss out as you've all been SO incredibly supportive 💖🙏.
(This message has been approved by mods of adhdwomen)
Here's my previous post about the project and its background: https://www.reddit.com/adhdwomen/comments/jvmlhi_am_extremely_time_blind_and_feel_like_none_of/
If you're interested in keeping up to date on project or have suggestions, I've also set up a subreddit: llamalifeapp
Thank you all again, take care over the holidays and stay safe! 💖
Marie
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2020.11.28 01:11 DangerActiveRobots I'll say it: one of my main reasons for staying alive in a world that is increasingly hopeless is that I want to see if they ever figure IBS out. I want to know EXACTLY what came into my life and destroyed me, my dreams, and my quality of life.

I'm sure I don't need to spend much time talking about how devastating it is to live with IBS. You're all right there with me.
It took me from a healthy and happy woman who had just turned 30 and was so full of life and hope for the future into someone who just focuses on making it through the day, not using too much sick time, and trying to keep up with healthy people who don't have to deal with this every day. I've had to give up on so many dreams of travelling the world, or even going out with friends. I don't date, and I refuse to let anyone that close into my life when I have to deal with these embarrassing and incredibly painful digestive problems each and every day.
There was definitely a time in my life when I thought I was coming up against my absolute limit, and I wasn't going to be able to make it. Sometimes I still feel like that, and to be completely honest it's rare that I go an entire week without thinking about suicide (I'm already in therapy, I'm taking medication, it's being addressed).
One of the main things keeping me going is just the sheer, burning desire to know what the fuck happened to me. What has happened to so many of us. I keep up with IBS research and there are some truly fascinating newer things coming out that are starting to shine a bit of light on IBS, but we're still leagues away from any real answers.
I'm in my early 30s, I figure that I have between 40 and 50 years left to live. It's not a life that I really WANT to live, but I'm going to do it just for the sake of finally knowing that we've figured out what IBS is and what to do about it. I want to die knowing that future generations will never have to live through what I've lived through.
I think that realistically we'll probably make baby steps in the right direction. The next big step will probably be in around ten years, and it will be focused on drugs that inhibit visceral pain specifically. We've already tried altering motility and we understand now that that does very little for IBS patients. Scientists and doctors are beginning to realize that the best step for now is to figure out how to alleviate our awful pain. Some people speculate that it's even possible that the abnormal motility could be triggered by the pain in the first place, which leads to more problems with motility, which leads to more pain, and you're quickly trapped in a vicious cycle that never really ends. Inhibiting the pain and sensitivity could potentially also produce better bowel movements.
We are making progress, recently scientists identified several key new features of the nerves involved in IBS pain, and these kinds of studies are coming out of highly regarded universities in Australia and even the Mayo Clinic here in the United States. Still, I think we're at least ten years away from the next generation of treatment options, and then probably another several decades away from a true cure- but I do think it will happen within my lifetime. If not a cure, then at least a true understanding of what IBS is (it's likely not one syndrome, but many related diseases that need to be identified and treated differently).
I guess living out of sheer spite for this awful condition is better than not living at all. I'm not religious so I'm not worried about my soul or whatever, and I even think that given enough time I could convince my loved ones that letting me go would be the best thing for me. Still, I'd like to be alive on the day that we finally consider this awful illness understood and manageable. Even if that takes fifty years, I'm here for it.
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2020.11.28 00:20 tjaylea I'm a Pathologist who performs autopsies on nightmares. This autopsy talked back.

Death is a taboo topic for so many of us. Something we shy away from, beat it over the head with a stick and scream at it to go sit in the corner until we’re ready to deal with it. It permeates every aspect of our daily lives without us often even registering it, yet we still run from it.
Because despite our various faiths, practices and beliefs; we don’t truly know what is beyond this existence. And that’s terrifying for so many.
Not for me, though. For me, it’s just work. Over here at Death May Die, we have a system that has remained unchanged for all the years I’ve worked here. It’s one I will apply to every entry in my strange life that I share with you.
Every 3 days, a new body winds up at my morgue with its own story about how it got there.
Every 3 days, I'll report back to you all with what I find.
Some corpses are contorted, misshapen from the decomposition, rotted or burning. Yes, still burning when I finally dump them on the cold table. Ritual deaths are tricky and require big rubbery gloves. Mine have a few fun stickers from the local music scene, gotta represent.
But they all have one thing in common;
Every single one of them is a product of nightmares. Literally and figuratively.
Now I’ll say here for those of you already rolling your eyes so hard they’re already prepping to become billiard balls; I’m not expecting you to start up petitions for nightmare integration or to start on your creature feature dating sim. It is not my job to convince you. Sturgeon is a weird fuckin’ place.
I’ll lay it all out now; Sturgeon has a serious nightmare problem on its hands. We all know they walk where we dare not tread and the folks like it that way. Unless you’ve been sentenced for crimes that shall go unmentioned or it’s near the end of their life, you are never likely to meet any of their various ilk.
A barrier separates Sturgeon’s denizens or “Daywalkers” from those who inhabit the darkest corners of our fears and those who came long before we stepped out of our caves. Cryptids, Nightmares, Beasts and so forth. They have their own histories, legends, infirmities, fears and flaws. Most importantly; they all die. That means someone must tend to them, set their bodies right and perform whatever practice they held dear to them.
Being the only mortician that is willing to cater to their final rites, it falls to yours truly; Fala McNamara, to do what needs to be done and provide them with their last rites, maybe learning something about them along the way.
With the latest iteration in the Tournament of Nightmares now over, my business has been… busy, to say the least. Bodies coming in covered in cuts, limbs totally eviscerated and organs simply gone. They love to keep a girl busy, that’s for sure.
But that’s not why we’re here today.
We’re here today because of the nightmare of the forests that was hauled in last week.
And what was inside of him.
-
I always hated early morning calls. Let it be known that Dr. Fala McNamara is not a fucking morning person. Not in a cute “don’t talk to me until I’ve had my coffee!” type of way, either. Miss me with that bullshit, I enjoy the quietness of night where the sun cannot expose my exhausted face and dishevelled frame like the judgmental bitch he is. Makes me love the Winter all the more.
As my bones rattled in the early morning chill, my mind wandered to a familiar question; Was med school really worth it? To become Sturgeon’s sole nightmare pathologist AND mortician? Looks borderline comical on a resume. Well, not like I could quit now…
Hobbling downstairs from my apartment, Khali hands me a glass of something with a cheery grin and nervous hands.
“Mornin’ chief! Sorry to get you up so early, our next client wasn’t scheduled until after dinner, but you know how it is… I hope you’re not mad?” They fumbled with their hands and flinched as I took a sip before nodding at nothing and rushing to clean the reception counter. Khali was sweet, more nervous than a shelter animal meeting a foster owner and easily the most alive thing in this entire building. They were good at their job, though, and always thinking of new ways to bring efficiency to the business, so I would always tread lightly when they had a nervous spell.
“You know you don’t need to call me chief. Morgues just have Morticians. Don’t worry about the early start, I’ll nap after. The hell did you give me, though?” I feel the kick in the back of my throat and my eyes widen, my feet feel lighter. Khali shouts back as they go to answer the door.
“Mellified Man! Vendor told me it’ll wake anyone up pretty damn quick, enjoy it, chief!”
I was halfway through a mixture of confusion and anger when the door opened and a burly man towering over us both sauntered in, a friendly smile over his face as a cold snap hit me and I rushed for the nearest coat or blanket.
“Hey, hey! Khali you little scoundrel, thanks so much for opening up. Wouldn’t have called if we could’ve waited, but uhh…” He turned his head back outside and waved for his subordinates to wheel in the body. “This one was special. Figured you’d appreciate it when you saw.”
The man standing in my funeral home was Detective Chino De La Sturgeon, head of the L & M Nightmare Detective’s establishment that handled relations and issues between the two groups. Cavalier, fiercely loyal and, at times, tactless. He was a reliable colleague and the sort of guy you could rely on in a pinch, even if…
“Oh GOD Chino, what is that under your fingernails?!” Khali recoiled as he went in for a hug before looking down at his hands, bemusement written across his face.
“This? Ah, it’s just corpse pieces, stiff got a little uhh.. “mulchy” when moving him, but you’re not gonna let that stop a refreshing morning hug, are ya?” He grinned and let out a bellow as Khali jumped over the counter to spray themselves down, repeatedly muttering “nope,” under their breath.
“If you’re done terrifying my staff, shall we get down to business? I’ve suddenly found my morning zest and I wanna get this started before I find myself passing out with a hacksaw in my hands. I don’t need another Christmas party incident.” I walked down with my arms still draping a nearby blanket around me like a makeshift cape; hardly professional, but Chino was a friend. He nodded and shook my hand as we escorted the body to the main room.
The building was built in such a way that accommodated both the funeral and more grisly research aspects; The greeting room Khali handled was small and dignified on the street level, portraits of animals in admiralty uniforms and nightmare creatures or Cryptids looking peaceful in their caskets or atop funeral pyres were also commonplace and brought a sense of peace to those with families that sought us out.
I’m not going to go cliche and postulate the notion that “what if HUMANS are the monsters?” because that would imply absolutism and to be frank; it’s fucking stupid. But if it exists; it has kin and those kin need closure. I provide that first in the reception area and the bulk of my preparation in “the chamber” that is situated behind and below. It is an area the size of a small warehouse, fitted with lockers of all shapes and sizes for all manner of creatures, a workstation with a speaker attached for both music and communications from the front desk, a slew of my own personal oddities in jars, antique collections for both enjoyment and ritualistic purposes.
A small alcove in the corner was dedicated specifically to what I called the meeting room. It housed my taxidermy animals from my earlier medical days and my council of spiders a dear friend had gifted to me some time ago. The council were superb soundboards for particular queries, concerns, or general advice I needed. Two dozen spiders ranging from the polarising Madame Rumble (Aphonopelma chalcodes) to the always comical Duke Strassburg (Theraposa Blondi) and last but not least; my near-constant companion jumping spider (Phiddipus Audax) Minerva with her blue striped and iridescent abdomen, piercing eyes and constant desire to nest in my hair. They all provide excellent advice in exchange for good feeds and decent space.
It was my own personal safe haven from the world above. Where the main companions I kept were either solitary like me or unable to respond at all. Immediately I felt the safety blanket envelop me and I got to work observing the basics of our new resident;
The body was seven foot, nine inches and weighed 272 pounds. An XL tray accommodated him decently, and the smell of burnt wood and moss filled my nostrils.
As soon as Chino unzipped the bag and the deer skull popped out, antlers mid-shed and the right stalk snapped in half, I knew what I was looking at. Folks called them many things; lords of the woods, forest devil, the woodsman and even master protector.
But whether he was revered or vilified, he was respected under one unifying name across the western world;
Leshii.
-
I gathered the tools and studied my grimoire for the area depicting forest beings, their anatomies, and their burial practices. “Mister Woodenhuser’s Guide To the Mythically Dead and Magically Charmed: a One Stop Guide For Every Ritual and Anatomical Blunder” I found the damn thing in a yard sale when I was six, it’d never steered me wrong before, even if the name was a fucking eyesore. Flicking through the thick and yellowing pages, I found the section on woodland beasts and how to both conjure them and bury them.
This was going to be rough.
Since he was found with no next of kin available, it’d fall to me to send the body off after I was finished finding out what happened to him. Joys of being both coroner and mortician, hoping nobody came to claim him in case we fucked it up. While I rummaged for the right tools, Chino told me what happened;
“It was nine minutes past six in the morning when we found him. His body was hanging by the ankles from opposite sides of a tall gate bordering on the Williams’ Estate. Shit was nasty… I think some passers-by spotted him, but they damn sure didn’t say anything.” He shook his head and sighed, running his hand across his five o’clock shadow and an incessant scratching noise echoing around my sanctum that set my own hairs on end.
“Chino… we talked about the noises, remember? We had a whole discussion about how they make me feel.” I felt my teeth grinding as he put his hands up and walked back.
“I don’t recall a talk, just you screaming to get out with a scalpel to hand.” He smirked wryly. “You mentioned something about castration and I promptly left.”
“Then you know not to make the mistake again, don’t you? Was there anything else? Or can I unwrap my present before this mellified man turns me inside out?” I wheeled myself over to the table and began unwrapping the Leshen from his plastic bag, laying out the tools I’d need for the procedure.
“Nah, nothing else. I’ll go grab a coffee with Khali, but uhh… Fala? Do you ever think about your future?” I looked up, and he was leaning against the door, arms folded and concern on his face like a big brother or a father figure ready to give the lecture of a lifetime. “I mean, y’know, beyond this place?”
“Get hotter. Get older. Learn more. Die. Feed the ground. Become particles and travel unconsciously. All pretty standard to me. Why?” I thumbed the pages of my book and looked at where I’d need to start, most likely the chest cavity, figures. But should I crack the ribs first or cut it open and see what happens?
“Don’t you want a family? Maybe someone to do this with you? Someone to come home to?” His voice dropped an octave. “I worry about you here. Five years I’ve worked with you and never seen you with anyone. Well, not since…” He let the moment hang in the air like some mistletoe I was expected to saunter under, but I gestured around me without looking up.
“There’s over 200 bodies in here, each of them with their own stories, loves, fears, hates and passions unfulfilled. I’m with them every day, they’re just as much my friends as you are.” I shook my head and gave him a blank expression, hoping the message would sink in. “Everything else is just white noise. I like it that way.”
From the council in the corner I could hear murmurings of agreement and phrases such as “Solitary hunters are kin too.” and “You truly WILL be on your own if my mealworm is late, child.” I chuckled and when Chino met my gaze, he shuddered.
“Alright, alright. When you start talking to The Council, I get unsettled, so that’s my cue to bounce. I’ll be upstairs so just call me when you have anything, I believe in you chief!” I couldn’t even retort before he chuckled and headed back up to the reception, the thick steel door slow to close and Chino’s voice booming out with a triumphant “Hey, Khali! Wanna see what partial spontaneous combustion looks like? Little demons really have no control, so the first thing to sizzle is their-” while Khali screamed their goddamn lungs out in protest. It was like having two grown-up, hairy children.
Nevermind, distractions are removed. Time for work. I put my dictaphone on play and left it on the side table as I slipped on my apron and began walking around the body.
Patient #621b - A Leshii. Male. Middle-late aged, most likely in their late 500’s. The thick black chains at the joints were seared his green, moss covered flesh. The branches and foliage that adorned his body had been pruned, ripped out or cauterised. Not a single leaf was spared, every edge was furled in plastic. Over his head was a thick bag with a hose attached to a car exhaust, still running when discovered by passers-by. A black substance oozing from the sides of his mouth, ears and eyes. Cause of death…
Look,. I don’t think I need to tell you that you can’t suffocate a plant, but you can certainly put it to sleep with enough deprivation. Some sick bastard decided to let the poison do its work while our Leshii was in a barely conscious state and unable to fight back.
Leshiis come in all shapes and sizes; some are able to adopt the visage of tall humans when they’re still powerful, but many lose their abilities as they get older, instead looking similar to towering trees with oak limbs, a broad face with thick antlers forming a small crown. Regardless, they are revered all around the world as defenders of the forests, sometimes even violently if they feel they or their kin are threatened. I once dealt with a scorched female Leshii who had tried one too many times to reason with deforestation workers in a small Slavic town. They thought her a demonic entity and “cleansed her” with fire. Her son looked upon me with bright, amber eyes and told me every tree would know of what she had done.
This particular one was still in his armour when he died, the deer skull still affixed over his head, defensive abrasions across his forearms and legs. Clearly trying to defend himself against something but ill-equipped to do so.
Nothing more for it, I suppose. I picked up the scalpel to make the Y incision. For those of you morbidly inclined; it starts on the shoulder, running to the lower end of the sternum and then downwards in a straight line over the abdomen to the pubis. Cutting through with some degree of effort, noxious fumes rising up out of the cavity, I set the scalpel down and gripped both sides of the incision on the shoulders and pulled.
When I let go and looked down, I had to stifle a scream as I backed away to the safety of my meeting corner, the council of spiders all crawling out of their burrows to either console me or get a better look.
“Is it food? We would appreciate food, very much so, yes.”
“Is the chairwoman well? We do not wish to lose our primary feeder.” My chest tightened and my legs shook, I was used to all manner of oddities when dealing with these kinds of creatures. But to imply I was desensitised to the unusual would betray the human elements I still harbour within me.
Taking small, tentative steps back to the operating table, I pulled the movable desk around and craned the light down over the section where his organs should be. Strange, green and filled of fauna they would be, yes, but the grimoire was never wrong.
Instead, I was staring down at a sprawling, densely packed city running from pubis to clavicle, the spires on top of houses and municipal buildings jutting up to just beneath the last layer of skin the Leshii had, their black brick design reminiscent of Victorian era housing, but with an immediately far more uncomfortable atmosphere surrounding them. I peered down and saw small creatures cavorting in long flowing robes, their faces hidden and only small spindly appendages coming out where hands should be. Some spoke openly on the streets, others were ferrying large carts of foods, pieces of the Leshii’s organs, from one place to another. I saw small picnic tables where these things gleefully tore pieces off of the Leshii’s flesh, spewing a viscous black liquid around their dwelling and pasting it to the walls.
Wherever the black liquid touched, the internal walls would start to grow a vile mould that sizzled as it spread.
In the centre of this strange, macabre town, lay a pedestal atop a series of brilliant marble steps. A pair of statues depicting two figures in black robes and painted skulls for heads gripped a pair of obsidian shovels with pride, standing on either side of a pyre that connected to a thick black pipe. A larger cloaked individual stood in front of a crowd, speaking impassionately in a language I couldn’t understand, but his hand signals and accompanying imagery certainly explained his agenda.
Sacrifice.
I could do nothing but watch as a small, screeching individual was brought forcibly by members of the crowd, now chanting eagerly as the poor soul was thrown at the preacher’s feet, struggling to get up and staring around for help from someone… anyone.
But nobody came to their aid. They simply pointed to the pyre.
The dark flame was lit and I swear my own operating light flickered, I was enraptured in the worst of ways as they shoved this person onto the fire and sang a chorus. The hood fell down, and I felt my eyes widen in an even greater fear. That of inaction.
It was a little girl, by all accounts human and with only small deformities that were transfiguring her hands into the same spindly limbs her contemporaries had. She begged for clemency, for help. In any language, that’s universal.
Eventually, her resistances ceased, and the body fell limp over the pyre before being pulled into the black pipe. A guttural whooshing sound filled the body as it travelled up through the city and past the throat of the Leshii.
I was at a loss for words. No amount of medical training or living in this town prepared me for this. I furtively glanced down at the Grimoire and hoped for some information. Unfortunately, little sentient towns living inside woodland beasts were not among their vast swathes of knowledge. Goddamnit.
In a flash, the bulb on my light fixture burst and shards of glass rained down on my head, plunging me into an imposing darkness. I cursed, but remained thankful I had a surgical cap covering my black hair.
A light erupted from the body, a horrific & forbidden colour that I was never meant to see; that no person should ever gaze upon. Minerva, my jumping spider, crawled out of my chest pocket to perch herself on the top & stared intently at the sickening hue, her little pedipalps shaking.
Casting my eyes up & away from the glow, I saw something that days on is still haunting me.
The Leshii was awake.
His eyes glowed a strong Amber, and the jaw encased inside his deer skull grew slack, as if accommodating a great weight trying to pry itself free from his gullet.
Then, he spoke.
A booming voice that bounced around the walls of my building, growing in ferocity and power as the observation windows above threatened to shatter & my ears rang, my skull splitting.
“I see a place housing the dead. A realm where the barrier is broken down and all that remains is flesh & unresolved business.” His head jerked and snapped, the deer skull following me as I moved, desperately trying to get out of his purview. “I see shadowy figures taking this vessel and putting it to work for their greater purpose. I see… I see…”
The voice grew discordant, manic even as the body regained life and it too began to jerk and thrash.
“I see Sturgeon bathed in twilight, the unliving standing tall on the bodies of the greeter and the keeper. The dead will come to greet the living and all secrets will go to the grave. I see all things unravel, an endless spiral of decay and death. Fractals upon fractals.”
Something began to manifest in the back of the room, arms gripping either side of the near 100ft wide span and propping itself up as it took shape. A blackened, featureless representation of the corpse laying in front of me, still bleating out unhallowed prophetic drivel as my nose started to bleed.
“The Orders will clash and brothers will spill their blood in the place with no name. The devourer of sins will be brought to her knees and there will be no more spaces in between. All will converge under the light of the dusk walkers before falling silent.”
My vision was swirling, and this shape started crawling towards me, featureless save for a hungry, gaping maw of a mouth, locked in a static expression of apathy that set me more on edge than any wide smile or angry grimace ever could. I backed up into my corner with the council, but there was no room left to maneuver. I didn’t even notice Chino bringing down an axe on the throat of the corpse, severing the head from the body in one swift motion. The splitting of wood and the screeching of so many living things at once put me in the fetal position as it ripped through the room. After a few seconds, I looked up and saw Chino covered in sweat and staring at the spot where he’d made the strike. Mustering up what little courage I had, I got to shaky legs and walked over, Minerva cowering in my pocket. The spectre from the back was gone, a thick cloud of ash hung in the air where it had reached out, some 10 feet away from grabbing me.
The Leshii’s eyes still shimmered and the deer skull started cracking, the twitching less pronounced. Eyes shifted from Chino to me before fixating on a spot above us and espousing one final proclamation;
“In time, all the stars will go out. One by one. And we will remember.” With that, the light faded and a thick pungent smoke left the mouth, making me gag at the first whiff. Adjusting my mask and exchanging a look with Chino, I stared back down at the city of creatures in the chest cavity.
Every single one of them was staring at us. Red eyes like fireballs glistened behind dark hoods. Smaller children hid behind their parents and frail members shook with fear, but the rest simply looked at us as a threat.
A single voice rang out from the town hall, a small shovel in his hand that he brandished with authority and they turned their backs to us, some shutting themselves in their homes while others huddled together. The two statues glowed bright as black smoke running through the town and enveloping the entire town until nothing but the spires were visible.
When the smoke cleared, only the cloaks remained.
Every single one of them had vanished, and now only the empty city remains.
“I’m guessing this is not what you usually find in a forest lord, huh?” Chino remarked, breathing heavily and letting the axe drop with a thud, wiping his brow. “Any ideas?” I didn’t immediately reply, the fear of my own mortality still sending shock waves through me. Though I am for the most part at peace with my calling and the idea of death, there’s something to be said for not going out on your own terms and the terrifying idea of being here one moment and gone the next. I just about avoided making a fool of myself and passing out by clutching the edges of the steel table and letting my breathing slow.
“No. No, that’s not normal for a fucking forest lord, Chino. Flowers, moss, bugs, even small pure water deposits where the bladder should be. THOSE are normal. An entire city of little people complete with still alive corpse? Yeah, fuck that. Fuck that right in the ear. Jesus christ…” I pinched my nose and took a breath, thankful the man in front of me understood my hot-blooded nature and lack of social decorum. “I need to finish the job, hand me the circular saw, would you?”
He blinked in surprise before obliging and taking a step back. “You’re not even going to take a break? Seriously? Nobody would blame you, y’know.” He frowned as I grabbed it with shaking hands, gripping the handle tightly to steel my nerves, taking my mind back to the lessons I’d learned over the years and finding my footing once again. I would not let this beat me.
“I’m here. I’m alive. I’m well enough to continue. Plus, for his burial ritual, we need to be done by first light in some 90 minutes, so less chattering and more skull scattering.” The deer mask now crumpled away and the frightened but definitively dead face of the Leshii staring blankly up at us, his hazel eyes, humanoid mouth and thick nostrils caked in the black substance that had spewed from the town in his chest. Some kind of poison. I scooped a portion up from the saliva, ocular, nasal and what remained of the bladder to put it into a vial for toxicology testing. Whoever did this had wanted him unconscious with the plastic wrapping and ensured maximum suffering upon waking up. Poor bastard…
First making a triangular incision on the top of the scalp, stretching from one ear to the other and ending at the crown, I used the saw to cut through the bone and protect the soft tissue, not wanting to cause any more of a mess than what already existed.
When putting the circular saw down, however, I noticed a brand on the back of the Leshii’s neck, just above the vertebrae and still clearly visible in spite of the clean cut Chino had made. I scanned my Grimoire fervently in the hours following this and came to find a match for what I saw;
It was a circular sigil with three distinct rings. In the centre lay the earth, rings running out, and each circle means something new. The central circle represents death, next life, outermost birth. The skin peeled off the middle circle, making it abundantly clear that this was no ordinary murder; it was a message.
Instead of finding a brain, however, I found something far more disturbing. Something that would ultimately set me on the path I find myself on now.
In the place of any kind of brain was a mass grave of the creatures in the Leshii’s chest cavity. So many of them were malformed, frozen in agony and charred. Thousands of them spilling out onto the table and disintegrating the moment they came into contact with the steel.
I marked the cause of death as poisoning and a homicide. Unable to remove any of the now ruined city from his body, we instead sewed him up and prepared for the ritual.
A Leshii is tied to the forests they inhabited, and while they have physical forms with lifespans, they are more spiritual than we could ever imagine. Their births, lives and deaths are indicative of that. A new Leshii is born every five years on the 20th of March, the dawn of the spring solstice, and a Leshii must be buried before the Winter solstice on the 21st of December, lest they spend months wandering and causing decay in their own dwellings.
With only an hour to spare, we ferried his body to the edge of the Sturgeon Old Forest and a hole in the ground hastily dug by Chino’s subordinates. No embalming, no headstone, no chemicals, just the soil. As we lowered him in, the sunlight crept over the horizon and the last rites were given. When the sun touched his body, a soft flame started at his feet and worked its way over his body. As we piled the soil over him, flowers sprouted out of the ground and within moments had covered the spot in its entirety with wildflowers, rhododendrons and a single Lily.
“Your son has been returned to you, a new guardian, to watch over your lands. Let him bask in your light and grow anew. From the soil, we return.”
Chino and I hung our heads as the light finished covering the gravestone and made sure not to look upon the source of the rustling in the trees, the crunching of leaves or the scuttling in the bushes. Our respect was necessary, not our eyes. After a couple of minutes and a soft breeze whisked through the air, we knew we were done.
As we left, I could’ve sworn I saw a pair of thick, spiked antlers jutting out from behind a treeline some distance away.
Perhaps a family member watching from afar.
Perhaps this Leshii found his way home.
-
During our walk back, it became clear there was going to be a lot of red tape and work to be done. I resolved to write up my report and work with Chino on anything he needed. Whatever this was, no matter how horrifying, I would send myself to an early grave with stress if I didn’t see this through. He told me things would be fine. I could tell he was lying.
As we got to the front desk and began our goodbyes, Khali burst out in a fluster, covered in the leftovers of our Leshii from downstairs. I always felt guilty for making them do cleanup, but it was this or feeding the council and I don’t think Khali is prepared for what they’d say to them just yet.
“Chief, you got a letter, I think… I think you may wanna open it.” They clasped it in filthy, shaking hands. I raised an eyebrow.
“You shaking because of the gunk? I know you’re particular about the messes, but…” I trailed off when I looked into their eyes; darting for a safe place to decompress. I shook my head. “Go clean up and get a coffee. We’ve got this.”
Khali bowed and ran for the bathroom with such speed I didn’t think was possible. Running my hands over the envelope, I felt the fine paper and my name embossed in perfect white cursive against the charcoal backdrop. As if it were calling to me.
Inside, the note was simple and to the point, written in a thick green liquid. The blood of the Leshii. Making my own run cold as my eyes scanned the warning;
“More will come.Memento Mori.”
A sigil scrawled beneath it, the exact same brand I’d seen on the Leshii’s body, but with the flesh covering the patch that was missing from his corpse. Two shovels intersecting in front of a painted skull. A name etched around the sigil in golden writing.
”The Order Of The Gravediggers.”
submitted by tjaylea to nosleep [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 23:41 funkthew0rld What happens when my unlimited lifetime reaches its expiry date?

I got on a Black Friday deal from a third party reseller years ago for “lifetime” but there’s an expiry date on my account sometime in the far future. Will you guys extend when that time comes or was I duped? The service is still worth what I paid even if it does expire at that date, but I would consider that false advertising..
submitted by funkthew0rld to Windscribe [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 21:34 CuteBananaMuffin The Absurdities of Water Fluoridation

by Paul Connett, PhD
November 28, 2002 from FluorIdealAlert Website

Water fluoridation is a peculiarly American phenomenon. It started at a time when Asbestos lined our pipes, lead was added to gasoline, PCBs filled our transformers and DDT was deemed so "safe and effective" that officials felt no qualms spraying kids in school classrooms and seated at picnic tables. One by one all these chemicals have been banned, but fluoridation remains untouched.
For over 50 years US government officials have confidently and enthusiastically claimed that fluoridation is "safe and effective". However, they are seldom prepared to defend the practice in open public debate. Actually, there are so many arguments against fluoridation that it can get overwhelming.
To simplify things it helps to separate the ethical from the scientific arguments.
For those for whom ethical concerns are paramount, the issue of fluoridation is very simple to resolve. It is simply not ethical; we simply shouldn't be forcing medication on people without their "informed consent". The bad news is that ethical arguments are not very influential in Washington, DC unless politicians are very conscious of millions of people watching them. The good news is that the ethical arguments are buttressed by solid common sense arguments and scientific studies which convincingly show that fluoridation is neither "safe and effective" nor necessary.
I have summarized the arguments in several categories:
- Fluoridation is UNETHICAL because:
As stated by the recent recipient of the Nobel Prize for Medicine (2000), Dr. Arvid Carlsson:
"I am quite convinced that water fluoridation, in a not-too-distant future, will be consigned to medical history... Water fluoridation goes against leading principles of pharmacotherapy, which is progressing from a stereotyped medication - of the type 1 tablet 3 times a day - to a much more individualized therapy as regards both dosage and selection of drugs. The addition of drugs to the drinking water means exactly the opposite of an individualized therapy."
As stated by Dr. Peter Mansfield, a physician from the UK and advisory board member of the recent government review of fluoridation (McDonagh et al 2000):
"No physician in his right senses would prescribe for a person he has never met, whose medical history he does not know, a substance which is intended to create bodily change, with the advice: 'Take as much as you like, but you will take it for the rest of your life because some children suffer from tooth decay.' It is a preposterous notion."

- Fluoridation is UNNECESSARY because:
  1. Children can have perfectly good teeth without being exposed to fluoride.
  2. The promoters (CDC, 1999, 2001) admit that the benefits are topical not systemic, so fluoridated toothpaste, which is universally available, is a more rational approach to delivering fluoride to the target organ (teeth) while minimizing exposure to the rest of the body.
  3. The vast majority of western Europe has rejected water fluoridation, but has been equally successful as the US, if not more so, in tackling tooth decay.
  4. If fluoride was necessary for strong teeth one would expect to find it in breast milk, but the level there is 0.01 ppm , which is 100 times LESS than in fluoridated tap water (IOM, 1997).
  5. Children in non-fluoridated communities are already getting the so-called "optimal" doses from other sources (Heller et al, 1997). In fact, many are already being over-exposed to fluoride.

- Fluoridation is UNSAFE because:
  1. It accumulates in our bones and makes them more brittle and prone to fracture. The weight of evidence from animal studies, clinical studies and epidemiological studies on this is overwhelming. Lifetime exposure to fluoride will contribute to higher rates of hip fracture in the elderly.
  2. It accumulates in our pineal gland, possibly lowering the production of melatonin a very important regulatory hormone (Luke, 1997, 2001).
  3. It damages the enamel (dental fluorosis) of a high percentage of children. Between 30 and 50% of children have dental fluorosis on at least two teeth in optimally fluoridated communities (Heller et al, 1997 and McDonagh et al, 2000).
  4. There are serious, but yet unproven, concerns about a connection between fluoridation and osteosarcoma in young men (Cohn, 1992), as well as fluoridation and the current epidemics of both arthritis and hypothyroidism.
  5. In animal studies fluoride at 1 ppm in drinking water increases the uptake of aluminum into the brain (Varner et al, 1998).
  6. Counties with 3 ppm or more of fluoride in their water have lower fertility rates (Freni, 1994).
  7. In human studies the fluoridating agents most commonly used in the US not only increase the uptake of lead into children's blood (Masters and Coplan, 1999, 2000) but are also associated with an increase in violent behavior.
  8. The margin of safety between the so-called therapeutic benefit of reducing dental decay and many of these end points is either nonexistent or precariously low.
Fluoridation is INEQUITABLE, because:
  1. It will go to all households, and the poor cannot afford to avoid it, if they want to, because they will not be able to purchase bottled water or expensive removal equipment.
  2. The poor are more likely to suffer poor nutrition which is known to make children more vulnerable to fluoride's toxic effects (Massler & Schour 1952; Marier & Rose 1977; ATSDR 1993; Teotia et al, 1998).
  3. Very rarely, if ever, do governments offer to pay the costs of those who are unfortunate enough to get dental fluorosis severe enough to require expensive treatment.

Fluoridation is INEFFICIENT and NOT COST-EFFECTIVE because:
  1. Only a small fraction of the water fluoridated actually reaches the target. Most of it ends up being used to wash the dishes, to flush the toilet or to water our lawns and gardens.
  2. It would be totally cost-prohibitive to use pharmaceutical grade sodium fluoride (the substance which has been tested) as a fluoridating agent for the public water supply. Water fluoridation is artificially cheap because, unknown to most people, the fluoridating agent is an unpurified hazardous waste product from the phosphate fertilizer industry.
  3. If it was deemed appropriate to swallow fluoride (even though its major benefits are topical not systemic) a safer and more cost-effective approach would be to provide fluoridated bottle water in supermarkets free of charge. This approach would allow both the quality and the dose to be controlled. Moreover, it would not force it on people who don't want it.

- Fluoridation is UNSCIENTIFICALLY PROMOTED. For example:
  1. In 1950, the US Public Health Service enthusiastically endorsed fluoridation before one single trial had been completed.
  2. Even though we are getting many more sources of fluoride today than we were in 1945, the so called "optimal concentration" of 1 ppm has remained unchanged.
  3. The US Public health Service has never felt obliged to monitor the fluoride levels in our bones even though they have known for years that 50% of the fluoride we swallow each day accumulates there.
  4. Officials that promote fluoridation never check to see what the levels of dental fluorosis are in the communities before they fluoridate, even though they know that this level indicates whether children are being overdosed or not.
  5. No US agency has yet to respond to Luke's finding that fluoride accumulates in the human pineal gland, even though her finding was published in 1994 (abstract), 1997 (Ph. D. thesis), 1998 (paper presented at conference of the International Society for Fluoride Research), and 2001 (published in Caries Research).
  6. The CDC's 1999, 2001 reports advocating fluoridation were both six years out of date in the research they cited on health concerns.

Fluoridation is UNDEFENDABLE IN OPEN PUBLIC DEBATE
The proponents of water fluoridation refuse to defend this practice in open debate because they know that they would lose that debate. A vast majority of the health officials around the US and in other countries who promote water fluoridation do so based upon someone else's advice and not based upon a first hand familiarity with the scientific literature. This second hand information produces second rate confidence when they are challenged to defend their position. Their position has more to do with faith than it does with reason.
Those who pull the strings of these public health 'puppets', do know the issues, and are cynically playing for time and hoping that they can continue to fool people with the recitation of a long list of "authorities" which support fluoridation instead of engaging the key issues. As Brian Martin made clear in his book Scientific Knowledge in Controversy: The Social Dynamics of the Fluoridation Debate (1991), the promotion of fluoridation is based upon the exercise of political power not on rational analysis.
The question to answer, therefore, is:
"Why is the US Public Health Service choosing to exercise its power in this way?"
Motivations - especially those which have operated over several generations of decision makers - are always difficult to ascertain. However, whether intended or not, fluoridation has served to distract us from several key issues.

It has distracted us from:
  1. The failure of one of the richest countries in the world to provide decent dental care for poor people.
  2. The failure of 80% of American dentists to treat children on Medicaid.
  3. The failure of the public health community to fight the huge over consumption of sugary foods by our nation's children, even to the point of turning a blind eye to the wholesale introduction of soft drink machines into our schools. Their attitude seems to be if fluoride can stop dental decay why bother controlling sugar intake.
  4. The failure to adequately address the health and ecological effects of fluoride pollution from large industry. Despite the damage which fluoride pollution has caused, and is still causing, few environmentalists have ever conceived of fluoride as a 'pollutant.'
  5. The failure of the US EPA to develop a Maximum Contaminant Level (MCL) for fluoride in water which can be scientifically defended.
  6. The fact that more and more organofluorine compounds are being introduced into commerce in the form of plastics, pharmaceuticals and pesticides.

Despite the fact that some of these compounds pose just as much a threat to our health and environment as their chlorinated and brominated counterparts (i.e. they are highly persistent and fat soluble and many accumulate in the food chains and our body fat), those organizations and agencies which have acted to limit the wide-scale dissemination of these other halogenated products, seem to have a blind spot for the dangers posed by organofluorine compounds.
So while fluoridation is neither effective nor safe, it continues to provide a convenient cover for many of the interests which stand to profit from the public being misinformed about fluoride.
Unfortunately, because government officials have put so much of their credibility on the line defending fluoridation, it will be very difficult for them to speak honestly and openly about the issue. As with the case of mercury amalgams, it is difficult for institutions such as the American Dental Association to concede health risks because of the liabilities waiting in the wings if they were to do so.
However, difficult as it may be, it is nonetheless essential - in order to protect millions of people from unnecessary harm - that the US Government begin to move away from its anachronistic, and increasingly absurd, status quo on this issue. There are precedents. They were able to do this with hormone replacement therapy.
But getting any honest action out of the US Government on this is going to be difficult. Effecting change is like driving a nail through wood - science can sharpen the nail but we need the weight of public opinion to drive it home. Thus, it is going to require a sustained effort to educate the American people and then recruiting their help to put sustained pressure on our political representatives. At the very least we need a moratorium on fluoridation (which simply means turning off the tap for a few months) until there has been a full Congressional hearing on the key issues with testimony offered by scientists on both sides. With the issue of education we are in better shape than ever before. Most of the key studies are available on the internet and there are videotaped interviews with many of the scientists and protagonists whose work has been so important to a modern re-evaluation of this issue.
With this new information, more and more communities are rejecting new fluoridation proposals at the local level. On the national level, there have been some hopeful developments as well, such as the EPA Headquarters Union coming out against fluoridation and the Sierra Club seeking to have the issue re-examined. However, there is still a huge need for other national groups to get involved in order to make this the national issue it desperately needs to be.
I hope that if there are RFW readers who disagree with me on this, they will rebut these arguments. If they can't than I hope they will get off the fence and help end one of the silliest policies ever inflicted on the citizens of the US. It is time to end this folly of water fluoridation without further delay. It is not going to be easy.
Fluoridation represents a very powerful "belief system" backed up by special interests and by entrenched governmental power and influence.
submitted by CuteBananaMuffin to conspiracy [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 20:52 dontbelievejustwatch how to initiate sex (and other issues here)

Hi!
I don't know how to phrase this, what kind of terminology y'all like, etc. So I'll just go for it
I'm a 31 M, girlfriend is 32 F. We've been dating about 3 months and had that talk a week or so ago about exclusive, etc. There's one MAJOR problem: we haven't had sex yet.
There's a few major problems: We've only ever kissed, nothing else sexual, and I'll get in to my concerns here in a second.
Kissing: We kissed the first night we hung out, almost 3 months ago. I've probably made out with 150+ girls in my lifetime, and the kiss always gets to a full blown makeout within seconds, mouths fully open, tongues exploring, etc. Ever since I kissed my gf though the first night, she just kisses, to this date. There's no tongue, no mouths open, it's just kissing. I don't know if this is her style, or if she's disgusted by me lol, or what. But how do I ask her? Sometimes I'll be with her and her friends and they'll talk about times they partied in college and my gf will say like "oh yea I made out with that guy" (that doesn't bother me, we all had fun in college) But I wonder, did they make out like I'm thinking of make outs with tongue, etc, or does she really think making out is just the kissing? How do I ask her about her kissing- does she only kiss me and used to actually make out with other guys, or is this what she considers making out (to be just kissing with no tongue)
SEX: this is a big one. The first night we hung out, we fooled around with the kissing, she "played with" my dick, said it was big, etc. I was ready to have sex but it didn't seem like she was down for the first night, no biggie. The second date, we drank a ton, (i'm not normally a big drinker) and we tried having sex but I couldn't get it fully hard and we stopped. I should also note that even though I've had sex with a little over 25 girls in my life, I don't consider myself good at it. I usually when I'm inserting my penis just kind of "aim" for the girl's vagina and let the girl then insert it, I need to be more assertive for sure. But Like, that night we tried having sex I couldn't get it inside her and we stopped and I blamed it on the alcohol. We tried twice more after that, same issue where it wasn't fully hard, I couldn't get it in myself, etc.
We haven't had sex or tried to since. I'm noticing that when I masturbate myself, I can get an erection and finish no issue. It doesn't seem as hard as it used to get, but whatever. I also don't get morning boners, but that's another thing. I'm going to see a urologist and talk about my concerns. I used to get boners when I'd hook up with unattractive girls just from making out, but with her, I don't get a boner naturally. I only get boners now if I play with it myself. I normally used to move the girl's hand to my crotch region while making out and it would escalate, but with my girlfriend, I'm scared to, because I don't want her to start rubbing my flaccid dick- it's pretty small flaccid, but a good size erect but I'm embarrassed for her to touch it flaccid since it's tiny lol. In the meantime until I can talk to a urologist, how do I talk to her and tell her I think she's hot, we need to have sex, and to get hard I need to either go play with myself to get hard or what? Also, I'm notorious among my friend group that I don't like going down on girls, but maybe with her I should try? Are there any tips?
I would love some advice for all concerns here if you wouldn't mind it would really help me out!
Thank you :)
submitted by dontbelievejustwatch to DeadBedrooms [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 20:46 Brothanogood Roblox IPO: 5 things to know about the tween-centric gaming platform

Roblox Corp. is planning an initial public offering amid strong momentum as millions of tweens and teenagers are glued to their mobile devices during the COVID-19 pandemic.
The San Mateo, Calif.-based gaming platform features a variety of “3-D digital worlds” that are built by users and developers, providing virtual communities where users can play with friends. Roblox RBLX acknowledged in its official paperwork with the Securities and Exchange Commission that it is experiencing a huge boost from users isolated during shelter-in-place policies related to coronavirus, but seeks to appeal to a wider, and older, audience to continue growing when things go back to “normal.”
Roblox originally filed for an IPO on Nov. 19, after disclosing a month before that it was beginning the process. Roblox said in the original filing that it sought to raise up to $1 billion; this figure is typically a placeholder that will be updated in later filings, but suggests a larger fundraising goal than the typical large IPO, which uses a $100 million target.
Roblox expects to trade under the ticker “RBLX” on the New York Stock Exchange. There are six banks underwriting the deal, led by Goldman Sachs, Morgan Stanley, and J.P. Morgan. 2020 has been a good year for IPOs with the Renaissance IPO ETF IPO up 94% for the year to date, compared with a 12% gain in the S&P 500 index SPX , and a 35% rise in the tech-heavy Nasdaq Composite Index COMP .
Here are five things to know about Roblox as it becomes a public company.
  1. If you don’t have tweens, you’ve probably never heard of it
If you haven’t heard of Roblox, you probably haven’t been around a pre-teen much in recent years. The company said that more than half of its 31.1 million daily users are younger than 13 years old. Back in 2018, the service claimed about 12 million daily users.
Since most online accounts require users to be at least 13, the company has faced criticism for inappropriate content on its service. In the prospectus, Roblox said it uses a human review team to screen content and has reviewed more than 68 million “assets” in the first nine months, and has “had a human respond” to more than 9 million customer inquiries within 10 minutes on average. The company hopes to appeal to older users and to retain current users as they grow up.
“We ultimately aim to be a brand that serves all ages,” the company said in its SEC filing. “An early sign of what is possible: our 17 to 24-year-old user age group grew faster than our core under 13 age group in the nine months ended September 30, 2020.”
  1. COVID-19 generated a huge boost of traffic
When the pandemic hit, Roblox growth exploded as tweens and others who were sheltering in place flocked to the online community. The number of daily users surged 82% over the past 12 months and the average user was on the service for more than two-and-a-half hours a day.
“We have experienced rapid growth … given our users have been online more as a result of global COVID-19 shelter-in-place policies,” the company said.
In the first nine months of 2020, Roblox said DAUs, or daily average users, grew to 31.1 million from 17.1 million in the same period during 2019. Year-over-year, Roblox reported 17.6 million DAUs in 2019, compared with 12 million in 2018.
Similarly, total hours spent on Roblox more than doubled to 22.2 billion in the first nine months of 2020, compared with 10 billion in the same period in 2019. Year-over-year, users spent 13.7 billion hours on Roblox in 2019, versus 9.4 billion in 2018.
  1. Its revenue is derived from the model that has Epic Games fighting Apple
Roblox makes money by using a virtual currency called “Robux” that users buy to upgrade avatar and make purchases, but that developers also use within the platform. That means Roblox pays a lot of money to third-party distributors like Apple Inc. and Alphabet Inc. at a time when those practices are being disputed by others.
Back in August, the popular videogame “Fortnite,” made by Epic Games, was banned from Apple’s AAPL App Store and Alphabet’s GOOG GOOGL Google Play stores because Epic tried to work around the 30% cuts the companies were getting from in-game purchases, and loudly disputed the practice.
Roblox said it also pays 30% of its one-time purchases to both Apple and Google when they are made on the respective stores. The company said for the first nine months of 2020, 34% of its revenue came from Apple store purchases and 18% from Google store purchases. That’s compared with 30% of revenue from Apple store purchases and 18% from Google store purchases in 2019.
The company said its bookings surged 171% to $1.24 billion in the first nine months of 2020, compared with $458 million in the same period in 2019. From 2018 to 2019, bookings grew 39%. If defines bookings as “sales of our virtual currency which we record as deferred revenue and then recognize that revenue over the estimated average lifetime of a paying user.”
Booking per DAU rose to $39.93 in the first nine months of 2020 from $26.75 in the year-earlier period.
In a nod to COVID-19’s part in the surge, the company said: “We do not expect these activity levels to be sustained, and in future periods we expect growth rates for our revenue to decline.”
  1. As revenue has soared, losses have widened
While Roblox reported a 68% surge in revenue for the first nine months of 2020, losses for the period more than quadrupled.
Roblox reported revenue of $588.7 million and a loss of $203.2 million in the period, compared with $349.9 million in revenue and a loss of $46.3 million for the first nine months of 2019. Roblox reported revenue of$488.2 million and a narrower loss of $86 million in 2019, compared with revenue of $312.8 million and a loss of $97.2 million in 2018.
The biggest culprits in 2020’s widening loss were payments to content developers and administration fees connected with the run up to the IPO.
“Developer exchange fees track closely with our overall bookings performance as more users on the platform and Robux purchased by our users drives more Robux earned by developers and creators,” the company said in its filing.
Those fees soared 190% to $209.2 million in the first nine months of 2020 compared with the same period a year ago.
In the same period, general and administrative fees soared 125% to $64.9 million. While $27.7 million of that increase was due to higher personnel costs including stock-based compensation expenses, the company also cited “an increase in headcount in our finance, accounting, people, IT and legal functions associated with our anticipated public offering.”
  1. Early investors get a big upper hand
The IPO is for Class A shares, which get one vote per share, as opposed to Class B shares that get 20 votes per share and are convertible to Class A shares.
Those Class B shares belong mostly to early investors, the first of which were Altos Ventures and First Round Capital. Altos has a 23.9% stake in the company with 114.3 million shares and First Round has a 7% stake with 33.6 million shares.
Later investors include Meritech Capital Partners and Index Ventures. Meritech owns an 11.6% stake at 55.3 million shares, while Index has an 11.1% stake at 53.1 million shares.
Tiger Global Management, which entered the picture in 2018, has an 8.2% stake at 39.3 million shares.
Earlier in the year, Andreessen Horowitz led a $150 million investment round in the company but doesn’t even break into the list of “greater than 5%” stockholders.
Source
submitted by Brothanogood to stocks [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 19:58 every_tatti I had one bright light in my life, and I extinguished it. I didn't deserve it.

Oh Carolean (Not the real name). Where or how do I start.
The way we met was so unusual and unexpected for me. Me, a stupid teenager, randomly joining anonymous forums coz he had just received his first ever smartphone, and the endless bounds of the internet were in front of him. So devoid of rationale was I back then, even my post was basically 'if you like this post but do not message, u a loser' (haha so funny am I right?). Sat there, I was hoping for someone to msg to kill time with. Didn't get any msgs (surprising for such a clever post!), but then u msged....and my life has never been the same since.
Even though we have almost zero in common with each other, actually contrasting views on almost everything, we felt so close from day 1 itself! You an extrovert, me a shy introvert. You hate travelling or experimenting in food, love watching tv series etc, whereas I was the absolute opposite of basically your whole persona. There was something so beautiful about talking to you. We used to talk all kinds of random nonesense and pull each other's leg for hours on end. Even though you were elder than me, it just felt like two goofballs losing it all the time. Like that one time, where we spent literally 8 straight hours texting, no break whatsoever! With more than an hour spent just deciding the dress u shud wear to ur frnd's wedding. We really were free and worryless back then,isn't it? XD
You really made me discover a whole new kind of friendship that I didn't know was actually how it's supposed to me. You made me discover a new dimension of myself- one that would do anything to make you laugh, making you laugh made me more happy than anything in the entire world. One that actually put lot of effort into making stuff to make someone else feel special. Omg, the handmade cards and stuff we've shared over the years! Everytime I made something for u, I put so much thought in and I always had a smile on my face while making them. Or when ordering stuff like a yellow colored lipstick for u xD. U made me realise that I could care for someone else more than me. I swear to god I would do anything for u. The time you told me about the time a guy was trying to grope u...I've probably not even cried that bad for myself anyday. You made me realise I could be a 'good' person too.
Then I neared the end of my high school, and a series of shitty events occurred with me. Coupled with some of my past experiences, it messed me up so much, I haven't recovered it till date. I'm not sure I ever can. I had all sorts of thoughts, struggles. But you were always there. You were the only one who was there. Sure, u didn't understand most of the things (which is good) and you probably cudve been more compassionate and understanding many times, but nonetheless u stayed! U stayed when everything was wrong with me! U didn't need to! U are 'the' popular girl! Everyone loves u, everyone wants to be with u, and rightfully so, u are so pure! U are the personification of 'positive' energy. That childish innocence. But u stayed, even though u didn't need to.
....And that's probably what has lead here for me. Now things started going really downhill this year. We have hardly spoken to each other. More strangers to each other than our first meeting. We are not at the same wavelength at all anymore. It's kind of my fault, because I didn't used to initiate conversations for months, because I was just scared to msg first for some reason. You had your faults too, it felt like I was a liability to u at times and you didn't care abt my feelings at times. But I never thought we'd ever be so adrift, ik u felt the same too. Attempts to fix it followed... but ik I'll cause u the same pain again and again. I have many issues with myself, I am not comfortable with my own self. And all this was because I'm miserable at times, and I don't want that to burden you. So I had to end it last night. I had to confront u and tell, that pls, let's stop talking. Ik u were heart broken, so was I.
But I had to. I have given you pain so many times now. So many times I've projected my issues onto you. You did complain many times, but I used to do it again and again. I've probably made u sad more times than happy, I feel like sometimes. I don't want to anymore. I can't seem to be able to beat my demons rn, and idk when I can, but the last thing I want is for u to struggle because of them. I don't want to bring you down. I don't want u to be sad or stressed because of me.
You are everything to me! You are the best person I'll ever meet in my life, I'm almost certainly sure abt it. It's almost scary for me in a way, because I'm not sure if I'll ever connect with anyone more in my lifetime. You were always pushing to meet me in person, but my insecurities and fears always got in the way. I've dissapointed you on so many occasions. I've always chickened out, I've made so many cards and stuff but never sent it to u. You were the only true friend I ever had, probably ever will have. In almost all aspects, you are all I have. Maybe that's one of the reasons too, coz I'm just too insecure and can't handle that. Yet I pushed you away. I told u to leave. I did it for u, I don't want u to have to deal with me. I'm a monster. I'll keep giving you emotional pain time and again.
I don't even know how I'll deal with it. You will be a wonderful memory for me, the best I can ever have. You know I can go on writing hundreds of pages about you, your pureness of heart. But every time I look at the unsent cards, the starred special insanely long paras I wrote for u in my email drafts, the shirt i bought for u on a trip but cud never actually ship it to u.....idk how ill deal looking at all those. Idk how ill handle the hurt, the reason for which is me. My worst fear is turning all these wonderful memories of urs into toxic triggers. I cannot stand that. Idk how ill fill this hole in my life. It's not even been 8 hours since we seperated, and I woke up with the worst pain ever. It felt like someone had tied a bowling ball to my chest. Idk how ill deal with myself. I'll have to distract and deviate myself every single time I think abt u, which wud be almost everyday. Omg I'm the most confused and deluded person. Sometimes I feel I'm sorry u met me, u wudve never had to go through all this. I hope time heals the wounds I gave u, I hope. I'm sorry I gave u so much pain.
You were everything I could've ever wished for, and I was not able to handle that. These 6 years were probably the best time I've ever spent with anyone, or will spend in my life. The world is blessed to have you. I wish you the best and happiest life ahead. You are an angel, a true angel. I'll miss you. I loved you more than I can anyone. The best friend one can ever have.
Oh Carolean, you were the only ray of light in my life. And I extinguished it. I didn't deserve you. I'm sorry. God bless you.
submitted by every_tatti to offmychest [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 19:52 every_tatti I had one bright light in my life, and I extinguished it. I didn't deserve it.

Oh Carolean (Not the real name). Where or how do I start.
The way we met was so unusual and unexpected for me. Me, a stupid teenager, randomly joining anonymous forums coz he had just received his first ever smartphone, and the endless bounds of the internet were in front of him. So devoid of rationale was I back then, even my post was basically 'if you like this post but do not message, u a loser' (haha so funny am I right?). Sat there, I was hoping for someone to msg to kill time with. Didn't get any msgs (surprising for such a clever post!), but then u msged....and my life has never been the same since.
Even though we have almost zero in common with each other, actually contrasting views on almost everything, we felt so close from day 1 itself! You an extrovert, me a shy introvert. You hate travelling or experimenting in food, love watching tv series etc, whereas I was the absolute opposite of basically your whole persona. There was something so beautiful about talking to you. We used to talk all kinds of random nonesense and pull each other's leg for hours on end. Even though you were elder than me, it just felt like two goofballs losing it all the time. Like that one time, where we spent literally 8 straight hours texting, no break whatsoever! With more than an hour spent just deciding the dress u shud wear to ur frnd's wedding. We really were free and worryless back then,isn't it? XD
You really made me discover a whole new kind of friendship that I didn't know was actually how it's supposed to me. You made me discover a new dimension of myself- one that would do anything to make you laugh, making you laugh made me more happy than anything in the entire world. One that actually put lot of effort into making stuff to make someone else feel special. Omg, the handmade cards and stuff we've shared over the years! Everytime I made something for u, I put so much thought in and I always had a smile on my face while making them. Or when ordering stuff like a yellow colored lipstick for u xD. U made me realise that I could care for someone else more than me. I swear to god I would do anything for u. The time you told me about the time a guy was trying to grope u...I've probably not even cried that bad for myself anyday. You made me realise I could be a 'good' person too.
Then I neared the end of my high school, and a series of shitty events occurred with me. Coupled with some of my past experiences, it messed me up so much, I haven't recovered it till date. I'm not sure I ever can. I had all sorts of thoughts, struggles. But you were always there. You were the only one who was there. Sure, u didn't understand most of the things (which is good) and you probably cudve been more compassionate and understanding many times, but nonetheless u stayed! U stayed when everything was wrong with me! U didn't need to! U are 'the' popular girl! Everyone loves u, everyone wants to be with u, and rightfully so, u are so pure! U are the personification of 'positive' energy. That childish innocence. But u stayed, even though u didn't need to.
....And that's probably what has lead here for me. Now things started going really downhill this year. We have hardly spoken to each other. More strangers to each other than our first meeting. We are not at the same wavelength at all anymore. It's kind of my fault, because I didn't used to initiate conversations for months, because I was just scared to msg first for some reason. You had your faults too, it felt like I was a liability to u at times and you didn't care abt my feelings at times. But I never thought we'd ever be so adrift, ik u felt the same too. Attempts to fix it followed... but ik I'll cause u the same pain again and again. I have many issues with myself, I am not comfortable with my own self. And all this was because I'm miserable at times, and I don't want that to burden you. So I had to end it last night. I had to confront u and tell, that pls, let's stop talking. Ik u were heart broken, so was I.
But I had to. I have given you pain so many times now. So many times I've projected my issues onto you. You did complain many times, but I used to do it again and again. I've probably made u sad more times than happy, I feel like sometimes. I don't want to anymore. I can't seem to be able to beat my demons rn, and idk when I can, but the last thing I want is for u to struggle because of them. I don't want to bring you down. I don't want u to be sad or stressed because of me.
You are everything to me! You are the best person I'll ever meet in my life, I'm almost certainly sure abt it. It's almost scary for me in a way, because I'm not sure if I'll ever connect with anyone more in my lifetime. You were always pushing to meet me in person, but my insecurities and fears always got in the way. I've dissapointed you on so many occasions. I've always chickened out, I've made so many cards and stuff but never sent it to u. You were the only true friend I ever had, probably ever will have. In almost all aspects, you are all I have. Maybe that's one of the reasons too, coz I'm just too insecure and can't handle that. Yet I pushed you away. I told u to leave. I did it for u, I don't want u to have to deal with me. I'm a monster. I'll keep giving you emotional pain time and again.
I don't even know how I'll deal with it. You will be a wonderful memory for me, the best I can ever have. You know I can go on writing hundreds of pages about you, your pureness of heart. But every time I look at the unsent cards, the starred special insanely long paras I wrote for u in my email drafts, the shirt i bought for u on a trip but cud never actually ship it to u.....idk how ill deal looking at all those. Idk how ill handle the hurt, the reason for which is me. My worst fear is turning all these wonderful memories of urs into toxic triggers. I cannot stand that. Idk how ill fill this hole in my life. It's not even been 8 hours since we seperated, and I woke up with the worst pain ever. It felt like someone had tied a bowling ball to my chest. Idk how ill deal with myself. I'll have to distract and deviate myself every single time I think abt u, which wud be almost everyday. Omg I'm the most confused and deluded person. Sometimes I feel I'm sorry u met me, u wudve never had to go through all this. I hope time heals the wounds I gave u, I hope. I'm sorry I gave u so much pain.
You were everything I could've ever wished for, and I was not able to handle that. These 6 years were probably the best time I've ever spent with anyone, or will spend in my life. The world is blessed to have you. I wish you the best and happiest life ahead. You are an angel, a true angel. I'll miss you. I loved you more than I can anyone. The best friend one can ever have.
Oh Carolean, you were the only ray of light in my life. And I extinguished it. I didn't deserve you. I'm sorry. God bless you.
submitted by every_tatti to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 19:46 every_tatti I had one bright light in my life, and I extinguished it. I didn't deserve it.

Oh Carolean (Not the real name). Where or how do I start.
The way we met was so unusual and unexpected for me. Me, a stupid teenager, randomly joining anonymous forums coz he had just received his first ever smartphone, and the endless bounds of the internet were in front of him. So devoid of rationale was I back then, even my post was basically 'if you like this post but do not message, u a loser' (haha so funny am I right?). Sat there, I was hoping for someone to msg to kill time with. Didn't get any msgs (surprising for such a clever post!), but then u msged....and my life has never been the same since.
Even though we have almost zero in common with each other, actually contrasting views on almost everything, we felt so close from day 1 itself! You an extrovert, me a shy introvert. You hate travelling or experimenting in food, love watching tv series etc, whereas I was the absolute opposite of basically your whole persona. There was something so beautiful about talking to you. We used to talk all kinds of random nonesense and pull each other's leg for hours on end. Even though you were elder than me, it just felt like two goofballs losing it all the time. Like that one time, where we spent literally 8 straight hours texting, no break whatsoever! With more than an hour spent just deciding the dress u shud wear to ur frnd's wedding. We really were free and worryless back then,isn't it? XD
You really made me discover a whole new kind of friendship that I didn't know was actually how it's supposed to me. You made me discover a new dimension of myself- one that would do anything to make you laugh, making you laugh made me more happy than anything in the entire world. One that actually put lot of effort into making stuff to make someone else feel special. Omg, the handmade cards and stuff we've shared over the years! Everytime I made something for u, I put so much thought in and I always had a smile on my face while making them. Or when ordering stuff like a yellow colored lipstick for u xD. U made me realise that I could care for someone else more than me. I swear to god I would do anything for u. The time you told me about the time a guy was trying to grope u...I've probably not even cried that bad for myself anyday. You made me realise I could be a 'good' person too.
Then I neared the end of my high school, and a series of shitty events occurred with me. Coupled with some of my past experiences, it messed me up so much, I haven't recovered it till date. I'm not sure I ever can. I had all sorts of thoughts, struggles. But you were always there. You were the only one who was there. Sure, u didn't understand most of the things (which is good) and you probably cudve been more compassionate and understanding many times, but nonetheless u stayed! U stayed when everything was wrong with me! U didn't need to! U are 'the' popular girl! Everyone loves u, everyone wants to be with u, and rightfully so, u are so pure! U are the personification of 'positive' energy. That childish innocence. But u stayed, even though u didn't need to.
....And that's probably what has lead here for me. Now things started going really downhill this year. We have hardly spoken to each other. More strangers to each other than our first meeting. We are not at the same wavelength at all anymore. It's kind of my fault, because I didn't used to initiate conversations for months, because I was just scared to msg first for some reason. You had your faults too, it felt like I was a liability to u at times and you didn't care abt my feelings at times. But I never thought we'd ever be so adrift, ik u felt the same too. Attempts to fix it followed... but ik I'll cause u the same pain again and again. I have many issues with myself, I am not comfortable with my own self. And all this was because I'm miserable at times, and I don't want that to burden you. So I had to end it last night. I had to confront u and tell, that pls, let's stop talking. Ik u were heart broken, so was I.
But I had to. I have given you pain so many times now. So many times I've projected my issues onto you. You did complain many times, but I used to do it again and again. I've probably made u sad more times than happy, I feel like sometimes. I don't want to anymore. I can't seem to be able to beat my demons rn, and idk when I can, but the last thing I want is for u to struggle because of them. I don't want to bring you down. I don't want u to be sad or stressed because of me.
You are everything to me! You are the best person I'll ever meet in my life, I'm almost certainly sure abt it. It's almost scary for me in a way, because I'm not sure if I'll ever connect with anyone more in my lifetime. You were always pushing to meet me in person, but my insecurities and fears always got in the way. I've dissapointed you on so many occasions. I've always chickened out, I've made so many cards and stuff but never sent it to u. You were the only true friend I ever had, probably ever will have. In almost all aspects, you are all I have. Maybe that's one of the reasons too, coz I'm just too insecure and can't handle that. Yet I pushed you away. I told u to leave. I did it for u, I don't want u to have to deal with me. I'm a monster. I'll keep giving you emotional pain time and again.
I don't even know how I'll deal with it. You will be a wonderful memory for me, the best I can ever have. You know I can go on writing hundreds of pages about you, your pureness of heart. But every time I look at the unsent cards, the starred special insanely long paras I wrote for u in my email drafts, the shirt i bought for u on a trip but cud never actually ship it to u.....idk how ill deal looking at all those. Idk how ill handle the hurt, the reason for which is me. My worst fear is turning all these wonderful memories of urs into toxic triggers. I cannot stand that. Idk how ill fill this hole in my life. It's not even been 8 hours since we seperated, and I woke up with the worst pain ever. It felt like someone had tied a bowling ball to my chest. Idk how ill deal with myself. I'll have to distract and deviate myself every single time I think abt u, which wud be almost everyday. Omg I'm the most confused and deluded person. Sometimes I feel I'm sorry u met me, u wudve never had to go through all this. I hope time heals the wounds I gave u, I hope. I'm sorry I gave u so much pain.
You were everything I could've ever wished for, and I was not able to handle that. These 6 years were probably the best time I've ever spent with anyone, or will spend in my life. The world is blessed to have you. I wish you the best and happiest life ahead. You are an angel, a true angel. I'll miss you. I loved you more than I can anyone. The best friend one can ever have.
Oh Carolean, you were the only ray of light in my life. And I extinguished it. I didn't deserve you. I'm sorry. God bless you.
submitted by every_tatti to lifestories [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 19:15 TheHousestRick UK, 144 HZ gaming and deep learning PC. Hoping to take advantage of Cyber Monday.

What will you be doing with this PC? Be as specific as possible, and include specific games or programs you will be using.
What is your maximum budget before rebates/shipping/taxes?
1400 pounds, but emphasis on value for money.
When do you plan on building/buying the PC? Note: beyond a week or two from today means any build you receive will be out of date when you want to buy.
Now, if there are well priced parts available; otherwise, I could buy parts that are cheap now if other parts are likely to come down in the next few months.
What, exactly, do you need included in the budget? (ToweOS/monitokeyboard/mouse/etc)
Everything except speakers, keyboard, mouse, and OS (and if no good value monitor available I will reuse my current one.)
Which country (and state/province) will you be purchasing the parts in? If you're in US, do you have access to a Microcenter location?
The UK
If reusing any parts (including monitor(s)/keyboard/mouse/etc), what parts will you be reusing? Brands and models are appreciated.
The items stated above.
Will you be overclocking? If yes, are you interested in overclocking right away, or down the line? CPU and/or GPU?
Yes, whichever will get the most value for money without bringing the life expectancy down past the part's expected lifetime. (I assume slight overclock increasing with time.)
Are there any specific features or items you want/need in the build? (ex: SSD, large amount of storage or a RAID setup, CUDA or OpenCL support, etc)
Do you have any specific case preferences (Size like ITX/microATX/mid-towefull-tower, styles, colors, window or not, LED lighting, etc), or a particular color theme preference for the components?
No, can be pretty or ugly with a slight preference for the former as long as it doesn't cost much more.
Do you need a copy of Windows included in the budget? If you do need one included, do you have a preference?
No.
Thank You in advance.
submitted by TheHousestRick to buildapcforme [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 15:54 MarkDMill Great deals for 11/27, including iPad Mini, further price drop on BundleHunt, and a *bunch* of other Black Friday sales

Oka Unarchiver has sponsored an ad-free MDM Deals this week and is giving away their premium version 100% free to MDM Deals fans. Oka Unarchiver is a fast, comprehensive, simple, and powerful, zip/unzip tool. Read more and get it free
Update: This deal went live after I posted, but it's awesome.
Macnificent bundle, 78% off, $272 ↘️ $59! - Choose any app for 50% off, or get the entire bundle for $59! Bundle options include: Timemator 2, RapidWeaver 8, Unclutter, Default Folder X, One Switch, Unite 3, Daisy Disk, Forklift 3, & Mosaic Pro; highly recommended. (Link fixed)
I searched through 16 emails and 32 websites to bring you today's best 45 deals in one convenient place. If you value getting the best deals all in one place, would you support this site with a pledge on Patreon? Not only do you keep deals coming, but you'll unlock some great perks for yourself!
Amazon Tech Deals for 11/27 ⠀ - Today's Amazon tech deals include:
submitted by MarkDMill to MDMDeals [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 12:47 Pampaaa thotthiehoottie

Bee Movie Script - Dialogue Transcript According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.
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2020.11.27 12:13 ZinanRthe7th What I would want to see in the sims 5 from the sims 2 and some ideas I had.

Memories Some made manually by player. The milestones in your sims life the most important should be made automatically. Good ,bad and in between milestones with a better system than in sims 2 but same layout and function improved upon. Lifestyles and sentiments from sims 4 that would be a whole mood with this.
Wants and fears are much better than whims They can throw in whims with this if they want but whims are not strong enough to function by itself.
Turn ons and turn offs more in depth like Turbo driver's Mod wonderful whims along with preferred traits and so on.Anything from height or hobbies could be a turn on or off.I would like it to work like this, sims have a romance skill like the road to romance mod where they unlock more levels as they go ,but only more in depth.I would like it if when it comes to some sims no matter what I try ,that my sim would not like them romantically it's more realistic ,that why my sims will have a type .
Personality and goals The whole neat ,nice, sloppy thing bring it back.
The way aspirations worked in the Sims 2 take it into the Sims 5 make it better .
Lifetime rewards
Hobbies Cooking contests Dance contests More activities Npc club leaders Club membership card Bring back dances from previous games Slap dance,hula and so on under retro dance pie chart Learning how to do special dances for a fee. Eg from the breakdancer and fire dance guy on the beach when you go on vacation. Dance studio would be great.
Animations that are fleshed out and well done getting into and out of cars Eg sims smooth animation that didn't look like they cheaped out. Carrying suitcase when leaving home lot for vacation Food stands where chef appears automatically. Tea table Locals that you can learn the culture of a world from. Unique culture and greeting for each world.
Vacation destinations Hotels the way it was done in the sims 2 but with more features. Like Tours that you can actually go on . I liked the travel badges /memories made while on vacation. Taxi pick up ( can be done like Uber service along side traditional taxis (more means of transport like trains, motorcycles, helicopters with woo-hoo interaction. like in sims 2,airplanes to go to other world like short loading screen and buses ,where your sims can become a driver as a job) would love more everyday jobs that only npc have most times to be an option for our sims as well Eg .being able to work as a maid / janitor ,mail person, fireman ,gardener and so on. Romantic sitting interactions
Plan honeymoon Classic dance Just like the the Sims 2 where you could rest your head on the other sims shoulder or hug their waist perfect for storytelling . Slow dance more options Surprise engagement love love this Caress hand Feed other Sim a bite Throw food Throw drink at Sim while sitting and standing.
(My idea add in play footise under the table *)
Make out and woo-hoo and listen to music in your car or just sit and talk in your car Better flowing animation like in Sims 2 even if it's just copy and paste from Sims 2 ,not just your Sims disappearing I'm the car. Cuddle in bed Make out in bed Read book in bed Nap
Big moment cut scenes with more out comes for Weddings Bring left at the alter (one more chill version and the one from dims 2) 1st Woo-hoo Aging up Dying Engagements (more variety in type of proposals both in interactions and cut scenes ) Collage enterance Collage and high school graduation Having baby Moving out or moving in to a new place Make optional with on and off buttons .for those who dislike cut scenes.
Option for after grim takes your sims soul to have a funeral or not to. Counseling from grieving sims.(from the npc terapist ) Option to comfort grieved sim Family and friends not in household call or check in on your household. A will and inheritance system. This would make a great memory for your sim. Family heirlooms and money. Separate photos folder for each household Family Albums like in sims 2 crossed with sims 3 scrapbook system.
Npcs in the base game not as the packs come out. They help make the world more alive. Dj that spawns at Dj booth automatically Big foot Npc with big foot hug interactions Give ability to fall in love. Make just a hairy sim Npc vehicle that would show up at your house Mrs Crumpulebuttom npc
Social worker Npc
Police officer Npc
Robbers npc
Firemen/ women Npc
Dog trainer Npc
Social bunny
Bellhop
Repoman
Pickpocket
Tour guide
Food delivery npc Chinese food and more not just pizza Cakes we can buy. Genie lamp with genie npc .
Vending machines
Poker table
The paper boy can be replace by a delivery man/woman from an online store like Amazon type store
Photo booths :) make big enough for up to four sims to take a picture togther. Photo booth woo-hoo Public woo-hoo More options Like change background More than just the 3 pose style options we had in Sims 2.
Cars that you can fix up yourself More of this. More styles vintage cars and so on.
Apartments like in the Sims 2 you can see into neighbors house after knocking on their door. Like a mix of sims 2 and sims 3 for this one.
Other things that I miss
The lore The sims team need to pay attention to the lore of past games and add to it and make it so we can play out the story lines in our games. More family members added to the families we know and love the Goths, newbies more generations of them. Big family trees.
The Sims that come with the game should have preset friendships, romantic relationships and jobs.This should tie into the lore that is set in the family bios. The ability to make our own worlds and name them.
Mental breakdowns Npc terapist that came when you had a breakdown. My idea ppl dressed in white in a van can come take your Sim with the breakdown for 1 or 2 days. Your Sim could maybe get a buff for it. Plastic surgery machine from Sims 2 mordenized
The drums set
The champagne bottle that allows you to make toasts at weddings
Fireworks Parents dancing with their children Children standing on their parents feet to dance with them The play interactions Like pillow fight Play red hands Punch you punch me and so o Spin around child Run away teens Lemonade stand (My idea )Kites Marco Polo game in the pool
Being able to place lots where you like ,more lots. More world customization
Big outlet store or mall like h & m store Bigger lots Stores you can actually go into and buy stuff. Grocery store and clothing store give back option to purchase clothing. If they want they can make the clothes you can get at the store only available at the store and different from Cas clothing a range from cheap to more high end clothing. Keep the same shopping interface as Sims 2 ,I loved trying on clothes and buying clothes along with sims 4 tablet check out but even with the tablet check out let sims line up to check out. (The option of them swiping a credit card at the check out would be better than the tablet to me)would adore having back leaving the store with a shopping bag.
Multipurpose lots would be great for community lots so it can be a park with a coffee shop and something else at the same time.
Bring back option to pay with cash. Things that they buy show up in their inventory even when your are not playing them.
The short term and long term Relationship bars
Crushes Like Love Deep love One sided love would be great More in depth love relationships Dislike a Sim because they like the same Sim as you.
The play interactions everyone could do from sims 2 ,like pillow fight play red hands and so on along with new ones. Would love jump rope for one sim and 3 sims 2 turning the rope 1 jumping rope. More small pets Like the ant farm Caged birds Fish in bowl a few more interactions Children should be able to ask / nag parents for toys ,snacks or to stay over that a friend so house for a sleepover
Children would run to greet parents as they came from work the little things made it so sweet. I would not mind if they bring this back and have it so children that are close to their parents or good natured only automatically do this on their own.
Rebellious teens should fall out with parents ,act out in class , sneak out of the house at night ,break curfew runaway from home and be able to get grounded . Likewise good children be rewarded.
Teens should be able to ask permission to start dating or date secertly. Teen should have the interaction to nag /ask parents for a new device eg cellphone.
More of an impact on families and relationships for cheating. Telling on a cheating spouse that you saw. So if my sim saw her neighbors husband cheating she could go tell his wife . More furious spouse reactions like in sims 2 but special mean interactions that only come up in a situation like this. Cheating spouse can be salty at the sim that snitches on them. More options then just divorce like if boyfriend and girlfriend take a break , go to couples councling, separate, kick out the house and move out the house .All of which should have an impact on the family as a whole children especially. I loved that according to your sims upbringing they could either grow up well or bad would love to see that idea more in depth in the Sims 5.
If we have the option to call her on the phone or tell her in person that would add some more drama.Rumors that can do serious damage toyour work life, home life and reputation.
If your sim is friends with another sim and they get into a fight I would love the option to break up the fight or jump in.(for family members as well) More than one fighting animation. Sims more likely to get along with sims that are like minded ( similar triats) like 20% more likely to make friends with each other. Sims having children and forming relationships on their own as an option that can be switched on and off.
Fleshed out family ,friends and romantic relationships in base game. Bestie , Childhood friend First love, Crush, Lover, Ex, Cousins 1st and 2nd , Grandparents Half siblings and Step Siblings ,Step parents , Neighbors, Fiancé and in laws recognized in game by our sims. Skills, memories and relationships that aline with the lore and the sims bio that makes sims seem alive. Being able to spend the night at grandparent's home. More things for elderly sims to do. More group activities sports , Elders sims that choose the single life and never settle down may or may not have regrets about path they went down. Doting grandparents that gives gifts to grandchildren on their birthdays and on the holidays.
Parents worry about their adult unmarried child or don't like their girlfriend /boyfriend. Parents want their children to succeed at school and wants them to get into the best school. Arranged marriage could be interesting
Baby interactions improved and more added to them. Feeding bottles carrying them around bathing them in the sink so cute. Would love more clothing and hair options for new borns.
Sims 2 Toddlers are my favorite toddlers teaching them the nursery rhythms and stuff needs to come back.
Teens can drive in sims 2 .i would make it so they need their licence to drive and parents or a driving teacher will show them how. Teens in sims 2 felt different enough from adults, we need height difference ,more skin detail more options for facial hair and body hair.
A preteen life stage would be cute.
Would love if Npcs would spawn where needed doctor and nurses at the hospital lots where you could go have your babies go get check up more risk in the sickness our sims could get. Things like broken foot or hand with matching moodlet and visual cast on sims after doctors vist. Dentist jobs because sims brush their teeth if they dont (or have too many sweets )they should get more than just bad breath maybe bad rotten teeth (dirty overlay on teeth )with moodlet and sims have to pay for the dentist to fix it .Braces and bad eye sight. Some Bit life randomness that you can turn on and off.
Some interactions the game has always lacked is How are you I love you romantic I love you family I love you friend I hate you Get out of my house You are Grounded Happy birthday Happy Holidays Congarts on your baby Congarts on your wedding Congarts on your promotion Congarts on graduating I didn't know he/she was married Let's go for a walk You smell Good morning Good evening Good night How is your husband /wife/ family
More deaths eg death by car crash get knocked over by car ,choking on food so on.
Well that was a lot thanks for reading all that what would you want to come to the sims 5 from sims 2?
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2020.11.27 11:01 busyybee Biggest Manipulator Award Goes To...

My father thinks he owns my life, and that I owe him for being kept alive the past 24 years, for providing me shelter, food, and for paying for my education.
I (24F) have told my Chinese parents that I will be moving in with my boyfriend (29M) after 1.5 years of dating. I’ve also made it clear that regardless of what they think, my decision is made and there’s is literally nothing that can influence it and that I will be out the door by this weekend.
My fathers exact words were, “I have been glad with your achievements in school and career development, but I’m very disappointed with your moving out decision.” He then proceeds to push all responsibilities onto me, saying how I’m throwing my life away for a black man whom he does not support me being with, then continues to belittle my BF by saying he’s going to be physically and financially abusive to me. He pretty much banned me from having kids because he thinks at my age I have to focus on my career development and my salary. My father is a believer that men’s rights are more important than a woman’s. And that when kids are born, it is the woman’s sole responsibility to sacrifice her job and life to raise her kids.
When that didn’t work on swaying me, he then tried to say it’s my duty to take care of my sister. He’s currently laid off from work and has interviews for positions out of state. He thinks it’s my obligation to take care of my sister if he works out of state, my mom is also working but apparently my sister needs someone at home with her while doing online learning for grade 6 elementary. To this extent, he intends on keeping me in the house until I’m 30, then he’ll find another excuse to keep me from leaving until I’m 40, 50, 60. Since when is it my responsibility to takeover your responsibility of raising children you decided to have?
After that didn’t work either, he began to financially guilt trip me by saying he’s paid for my education and car (bought in 2020) with his lifetime savings because he does not want me to be financially burdened. And let me tell you guys, 2020 has been the worst year for me in terms of my parents trying to guilt trip me. Whenever I acquired money from my tax returns, or proceeds from having my previous car written off from a non-fault accident, my dad always finds ways to get the money into his pocket by saying that this money is to repay back the money he used to buy my car. I used to have a joint account with my mom that I’ve been putting a little of my paycheque into to help save for down payment or if my mom needed it for emergencies. Guess what? My dad hacks into my moms online banking and transfers all the money to his own account. All in all 8k (tax returns) + 6k (salvage amount for old car) + 10k (supposed down payment savings) = 24k have gone into my dads hands unwillingly because I owe him for getting to live the life I’m living. I’ve never asked for a luxurious life, in fact I wanted to get a car loan because I know money is never free and there is always, always strings attached.
I don’t understand why parents think they have a right to controlling and manipulating your life. My parents do not deserve to have children and they never knew how to communicate with their children. It’s always been do this, do that or I’ll hit you. I am mentally exhausted and trying to find an escape to live life the way I can control. I hate my father, so much that he’s nothing more than a male figure in the house. I’ve had about enough, and moving out is just the first step into cutting contact with my parents once and for all.
submitted by busyybee to AsianParentStories [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 06:24 burneraccount9383 My experience with surgical abortion

I’m posting my personal experience for anyone who is currently exploring abortion options and not sure which one to do — I’m going to try to convince you to do surgical! My partner and I knew we had to have an abortion because we’re 22 and not nearly responsible or financially stable enough to bring a child into the world. We were also both living with our parents at the time (post-pandemic graduates) so the situation was extra stressful because I had to hide everything and all my pregnancy symptoms from my parents. To be blunt, the moment we found out I was pregnant, we set out for abortion options immediately - we thought it would be best to get a hotel room for a few nights, get the pill, and have a medical abortion. For some reason, the idea of surgical seemed so much scarier so I didn’t do a lot of research into it. BUT, when we were booking the appointment with Planned Parenthood, the receptionist convinced us that a surgical abortion would be best for our situation - faster, more reliable, and safer. I am so, so grateful she persuaded us because the in-clinic surgical abortion was so much easier than the horror stories I’ve read about the medical abortion. (Grace from Chicago PP, if you’re reading this, I love you)
So I was supposed to be sedated and asleep for the procedure — I would go to sleep pregnant and wake up not pregnant and that would be the end of it. But when my partner and I got to the Planned Parenthood, they told us I couldn’t be sedated because I had food past midnight on the night before (I was never told that, I was only told not to have food 8 hours before the actual appointment). They asked me if I wanted to reschedule to be asleep and the only available date was next week. I panicked because I physically could not wait another week because this pregnancy had been tormenting me emotionally and haunting me with nausea, food aversion, hormones, pain, and cramps — I knew I had to get it over with as quickly as possible because I couldn’t stay another week at my parents house and hide my pregnancy (they’re very traditional and conservative and would disown me if they found out). So, even though I was so terrified about being awake during this procedure, I knew that there was no other option. I was so terrified, but the staff at PP was incredibly kind to me and let me feel like everything would be okay. The worst part was the waiting for the procedure itself, because all I could do was anticipate the cramping pain I had read about when you’re awake for the procedure.
They first took my ultrasound where I found out I was 7 weeks along. Then I sat in the waiting room for a bit. When my abortion finally started, they took me into a room and they gave me a blanket because I said I was cold, and they were super accommodating. They answered all my questions and were very calm and patient with me when I was getting increasingly freaked out. Then they started the actual procedure, which is when I started to have a panic attack. Needles scare me and the stinging sensation from the local anesthetic was already freaking me out, and I began to breathe uncontrollably. Then they began the second part, where you feel the worst cramps you could ever feel in a lifetime. I won’t lie, it was pretty awful BUT it was super short. The cramps were severe though and I don’t want to downplay that. The nurse who was holding my hand tight was guiding my breathing throughout it to make sure I didn’t hyperventilate. But the procedure itself it only a few minutes long and right when I felt like I couldn’t possibly take the pain anymore, the doctor told me I only have 15 seconds left and that I’m almost done. I thought that the suction process of the actual abortion would start after that, but they had already done it during the intense hell cramps - I just didn’t notice because I was so focused on the pain of cramps! So the abortion and vacuuming itself went fast, but the cramping was an 11 from a scale of 1-10. Every woman is different though, and I recognize that I’m a huge baby when it comes to low pain tolerance.
But the pain started to subside afterwards pretty quickly. I put a pad and my clothes back on, and they put me in a reclined chair in the waiting room with a blanket as they checked my vitals. They gave me goldfish and sprite while I was waiting to be discharged, and I recovered from the cramping pain and soreness pretty quickly while I was there. They made the experience so comfortable, and they were so kind and not judgmental that I wish I donated more to them.
When my partner and I got back home, I felt more soreness and cramping because the ibuprofen was starting to wear off. They told me not to take another dose until 9pm, but I ended up taking another dose earlier because I was starting to feel more aware of my soreness. I definitely recommend to get high afterwards so that you don’t feel anything. The heating pad helped to make my cramp soreness feel better. I was totally fine the next day.
So if I’d taken the medical abortion pill, my partner would have seen me go through immense pain that lasts up to 24 hours, according to what I read on other forums. And you don’t know for sure if it worked completely, so you have to go back for a follow-up visit. The surgical one was quick, reliable, and easy. I was fine the next day. It was such a relief not to drag it out, and also not let my partner see my in that state of level 11 hell cramps.
I think having a surgical abortion was less traumatizing than what I would have experienced with the pill as well. The nurses really got me through this whole thing, and gave me support in a way that my partner wouldn’t really be able to. It made me feel a lot safer with medical professionals taking care of it for me than if I was doing this on my own in a hotel room. I still have feelings of guilt and depression, but I think the trauma and loss would have been a lot worse if I experienced those cramps for longer than 3 min and physically felt the fetus come out of me. Anyway, if you’re on the fence about it - I’m glad i went with surgical, and I couldn’t imagine doing the medical now. Also - being awake was really really not that bad, in fact, it made everything go a lot faster. When I was in the waiting room, one woman was getting sedated and having a panic attack during that, so that made me kind of glad I didn’t go down that route if food affects it a lot! I know it’s scary either way, but remember that the actual vacuuming procedure only takes a few minutes, and then it’s all over. You’ve got this!
Finally, I want to say that it’s natural and healthy to give yourself time to grieve. I was really struggling with my rational and detached mindset that this was the right decision, I’m young and unemployed, it’s just a bunch of cells, it’s irrational to feel sad about something that never existed, get over it, etc. and so I just held in this sadness and depression because I wasn’t fully letting myself process. It’s been a little over a month now, and I am so relieved and have no regrets, but I still feel guilty when I remember. I wrote an apology letter to the unborn baby (and burned it) and that helped me forgive myself. Starting therapy in a few weeks. Virtually journaling about my thoughts with password-protected entries. Allowing myself to feel sad about the loss, even if I made the choice myself and didn’t want a baby. I hope if you come across this, it helps you through your abortion and afterwards too.
submitted by burneraccount9383 to abortion [link] [comments]


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submitted by betteronne to RedditbayPro [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 04:00 ambaroot Thinking I (F28) should give up pursuing romantic relationships for the remainder of my life. Am I being extreme at all? Looking for some balanced perspectives.

A bit of background: I am a 28 year old female who has never been in a relationship, or even gone out on a date for that matter. I have been asked for my number a few times in real life (though I don’t really consider any of these requests to have been serious) but aside from that I haven’t really received any positive attention from the opposite sex, and have certainly not received such attention from the men I have found to be personally attractive (I rarely get crushes but when I do they are intense one sided scenarios, if you can even call them that, and they seem to wreck havoc on my life).
To give you a bit more information and to flesh out the picture a bit more: I have attempted online dating a few times (seems to be the only viable option I have since date offers aren’t exactly piling up lol) and my online dating experiences, like my IRL experiences, have been… uh, kind of tragic :D.
The (few) messages I received from men were always short, half-hearted, if not entirely copy-pasted, one sentence openers that often went (or implied they would go) nowhere… and they were nearly always from guys I didn’t find attractive. I don’t mean this to be “shallow” (especially since I realize that I am on the receiving end of this exact same criticism when it comes to the vast majority of male opinion) but I do think that if I am not even remotely interested in a person on a physical-attraction level… a romantic relationship, or even a date, is not something worth attempting. Similarly, there are a ton of “objectively” attractive guys I tend to pass on when using these apps (or even ignore/don’t really give attention to IRL) because objective good looks don’t translate into physical attraction for me as well. So, physical attraction is an important requisite for a date I guess… but it is worth noting that physical attractiveness itself will also be passed over if the person in question doesn’t seem compatible mentally or emotionally. I did eventually message a few of the men whose profiles interested me the most and was, in both cases, ignored by them.
So this all brings me to the reason why I made this post today and what I have been thinking about lately. I recently (few days ago) re-activated my dating profile to once again to try my hand at this slightly uncomfortable way of perhaps “finding” someone I appeal to who feels a reciprocal interest in me… for an eventual date. After perusing and swiping through thousands (probably) of men I ended up “liking” (right swiping) less than 10. Only two of those liked me back. Neither of them have messaged me or seem interested in doing so (likely because they swiped right on everyone)… and I am not interested in shooting them the first message as that has tended to not work in my favor before. So… this recent experience has made me reconfirm and in a sense finally really “accept” that I am not attractive to most men, and more importantly, that I don’t interest the few men who I find attractive myself. I expect my online dating experiences (if I continue them, which I am very nearly about to cease) to continue to be dismal, and my IRL (non)dating/relationship experiences to continue to likewise be bleak, and well, overall although I am not bitter or taking anything too personally (as I know that there are some men and women out there who find themselves in a similarly unenvied situation as this one) I find coming to the understanding or realization that I don’t appeal to those who most interest me so clearly again (it’s been a repeated theme all my life) at 28 after a lifetime of a void in the romantic department to be a little disheartening because, well, like everyone I do want to experience a mutually satisfying romantic partnership... and was hoping, eventually, I would. Being realistic however, in light of my recent and lifelong (and projected) experiences I am thinking it would be better to cease pursing romantic relationships at all.
Is this decision too extreme? To be clear, what I mean by "decision" is: I think I should decide to cease the pursuit of romantic partnerships (instead of trying and trying and and hoping against odds I’ll one day be successful where I have never been successful) and further I think I should should begin to adjust my life plans and expectations to one where I will be living single indefinitely. In other words: I think I should decide to stop making a romantic relationship one of my goals in life, period, and give my attention to other areas of life entirely. The reason why I wanted to post this question in here however (I don’t really have anyone I think I’d like to discuss this with IRL) before I “settle’ or sink into this decision is because I want to get outside thoughts, voices or opinion on this… whole thing. I am hoping in particular to get thoughts on whether or not my line of thinking is extreme or overeactive in anyway…. basically: if there was someone in my circumstance dealing with this same issue of not appealing to anyone they want to date I would tell them to 1) work on yourself to increase how desirable you are in order to better attract those who interest you, and/or 2) seek to adjust your expectations and date those who are more in your “range” of attractiveness, and/or 3) forgo relationships altogether if you genuinely cannot find someone you find attractive who feels similarly about you because romantic partnership, while highly desirable, is ultimately not necessary to live a good life.
In my case concerning 1) while I could develop my mind, character and emotional maturity overtime, I am basically in the 5 to 10 year age range where I will probably look the most decent I ever will in my entire life span (the “prime” of life as they say), and although I could make small adjustments to my appearance (I am of average weight, perhaps a little thinner than the average, dress in slightly fashionable but more comfortable clothing, and wear some minimal cosmetics) I do not think such changes will increase my immediate “desirability” much if at all, meaning, someone is not physically attracted to me now… probably wouldn’t change their opinion if I made minor changes. Where it concerns 2) I don’t know how appropriate this suggestion would be for me since, as mentioned, I don’t pursue people on the basis of objective good looks, but on what I find personally appeals to me and what I deem physical attractiveness (many of the sort of guys I find attractive are probably only average or slightly above average in looks) and even this marker itself is passed up on if/when other factors don’t seem to indicate compatibility. If I dated people who were “objectively” as attractive as me (or within a low range of appeal)… well, I would be hard pressed to find anyone at all for meeting the minimal “physical attractiveness” threshold. Which means then… if it seems to be the case that I can only realistically date people within my range of attractiveness, and if I find such individuals unattractive (in the same way most men, including those in this range find me unattractive)… it means I am either consistently looking to date people who are out of my range who don’t want to date me in return, or I am looking to date people who I do not find physically attractive and so... in fact, don't want to date. Whew… quite a jumble of words and sorry for being so rambly but this brings me to my last option.
3) forgo relationships altogether if you genuinely cannot find someone you find attractive who feels similarly about you because romantic partnership, while highly desirable, is not necessary live a good life.
This is exactly what I have concluded I should probably do and am leaning towards at this moment as much as, truthfully, it depresses me a bit to consider making such a choice. I tend think for my own wellbeing however, and in the long run, I will probably find more joy in life if I resolutely give up the (so far) exhausting, disappointing desire/pursuit for partnership. Is this position extreme at all? What do you guys think. Any advice?
TL;DR: I can’t get a date to save my life because I am secretly Ms. Frankenstein I guess (or some such creature) and so being that the only guys who pursue me are those within my “looks range” … and I do not find them physically attractive enough to want to date them (the same thing most men feel towards me overall), I think a realistic position at this point is to cheerfully (or as much as I can muster) let go of the expectation and desire to be in romantic partnership at all. In other words, I think it is best to no longer make seeking or being in a romantic partnership a goal in my life and should plan, and expect, lifelong singledom. Is this position extreme?
submitted by ambaroot to Advice [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 03:51 ambaroot Me [28F] thinking I should give up pursuing romantic relationships for the remainder of my life. Am I being extreme at all? Looking for some balanced perspectives.

A bit of background: I am a 28 year old female who has never been in a relationship, or even gone out on a date for that matter. I have been asked for my number a few times in real life (though I don’t really consider any of these requests to have been serious) but aside from that I haven’t really received any positive attention from the opposite sex, and have certainly not received such attention from the men I have found to be personally attractive (I rarely get crushes but when I do they are intense one sided scenarios, if you can even call them that, and they seem to wreck havoc on my life).
To give you a bit more information and to flesh out the picture a bit more: I have attempted online dating a few times (seems to be the only viable option I have since date offers aren’t exactly piling up lol) and my online dating experiences, like my IRL experiences, have been… uh, kind of tragic :D.
The (few) messages I received from men were always short, half-hearted, if not entirely copy-pasted, one sentence openers that often went (or implied they would go) nowhere… and they were nearly always from guys I didn’t find attractive. I don’t mean this to be “shallow” (especially since I realize that I am on the receiving end of this exact same criticism when it comes to the vast majority of male opinion) but I do think that if I am not even remotely interested in a person on a physical-attraction level… a romantic relationship, or even a date, is not something worth attempting. Similarly, there are a ton of “objectively” attractive guys I tend to pass on when using these apps (or even ignore/don’t really give attention to IRL) because objective good looks don’t translate into physical attraction for me as well. So, physical attraction is an important requisite for a date I guess… but it is worth noting that physical attractiveness itself will also be passed over if the person in question doesn’t seem compatible mentally or emotionally. I did eventually message a few of the men whose profiles interested me the most and was, in both cases, ignored by them.
So this all brings me to the reason why I made this post today and what I have been thinking about lately. I recently (few days ago) re-activated my dating profile to once again to try my hand at this slightly uncomfortable way of perhaps “finding” someone I appeal to who feels a reciprocal interest in me… for an eventual date. After perusing and swiping through thousands (probably) of men I ended up “liking” (right swiping) less than 10. Only two of those liked me back. Neither of them have messaged me or seem interested in doing so (likely because they swiped right on everyone)… and I am not interested in shooting them the first message as that has tended to not work in my favor before. So… this recent experience has made me reconfirm and in a sense finally really “accept” that I am not attractive to most men, and more importantly, that I don’t interest the few men who I find attractive myself. I expect my online dating experiences (if I continue them, which I am very nearly about to cease) to continue to be dismal, and my IRL (non)dating/relationship experiences to continue to likewise be bleak, and well, overall although I am not bitter or taking anything too personally (as I know that there are some men and women out there who find themselves in a similarly unenvied situation as this one) I find coming to the understanding or realization that I don’t appeal to those who most interest me so clearly again (it’s been a repeated theme all my life) at 28 after a lifetime of a void in the romantic department to be a little disheartening because, well, like everyone I do want to experience a mutually satisfying romantic partnership... and was hoping, eventually, I would. Being realistic however, in light of my recent and lifelong (and projected) experiences I am thinking it would be better to cease pursing romantic relationships at all.
Is this decision too extreme? To be clear, what I mean by "decision" is: I think I should decide to cease the pursuit of romantic partnerships (instead of trying and trying and and hoping against odds I’ll one day be successful where I have never been successful) and further I think I should should begin to adjust my life plans and expectations to one where I will be living single indefinitely. In other words: I think I should decide to stop making a romantic relationship one of my goals in life, period, and give my attention to other areas of life entirely. The reason why I wanted to post this question in here however (I don’t really have anyone I think I’d like to discuss this with IRL) before I “settle’ or sink into this decision is because I want to get outside thoughts, voices or opinion on this… whole thing. I am hoping in particular to get thoughts on whether or not my line of thinking is extreme or overeactive in anyway…. basically: if there was someone in my circumstance dealing with this same issue of not appealing to anyone they want to date I would tell them to 1) work on yourself to increase how desirable you are in order to better attract those who interest you, and/or 2) seek to adjust your expectations and date those who are more in your “range” of attractiveness, and/or 3) forgo relationships altogether if you genuinely cannot find someone you find attractive who feels similarly about you because romantic partnership, while highly desirable, is ultimately not necessary to live a good life.
In my case concerning 1) while I could develop my mind, character and emotional maturity overtime, I am basically in the 5 to 10 year age range where I will probably look the most decent I ever will in my entire life span (the “prime” of life as they say), and although I could make small adjustments to my appearance (I am of average weight, perhaps a little thinner than the average, dress in slightly fashionable but more comfortable clothing, and wear some minimal cosmetics) I do not think such changes will increase my immediate “desirability” much if at all, meaning, someone is not physically attracted to me now… probably wouldn’t change their opinion if I made minor changes. Where it concerns 2) I don’t know how appropriate this suggestion would be for me since, as mentioned, I don’t pursue people on the basis of objective good looks, but on what I find personally appeals to me and what I deem physical attractiveness (many of the sort of guys I find attractive are probably only average or slightly above average in looks) and even this marker itself is passed up on if/when other factors don’t seem to indicate compatibility. If I dated people who were “objectively” as attractive as me (or within a low range of appeal)… well, I would be hard pressed to find anyone at all for meeting the minimal “physical attractiveness” threshold. Which means then… if it seems to be the case that I can only realistically date people within my range of attractiveness, and if I find such individuals unattractive (in the same way most men, including those in this range find me unattractive)… it means I am either consistently looking to date people who are out of my range who don’t want to date me in return, or I am looking to date people who I do not find physically attractive and so... in fact, don't want to date. Whew… quite a jumble of words and sorry for being so rambly but this brings me to my last option.
3) forgo relationships altogether if you genuinely cannot find someone you find attractive who feels similarly about you because romantic partnership, while highly desirable, is not necessary live a good life.
This is exactly what I have concluded I should probably do and am leaning towards at this moment as much as, truthfully, it depresses me a bit to consider making such a choice. I tend think for my own wellbeing however, and in the long run, I will probably find more joy in life if I resolutely give up the (so far) exhausting, disappointing desire/pursuit for partnership. Is this position extreme at all? What do you guys think. Any advice?
TL;DR: I can’t get a date to save my life because I am secretly Ms. Frankenstein I guess (or some such creature) and so being that the only guys who pursue me are those within my “looks range” … and I do not find them physically attractive enough to want to date them (the same thing most men feel towards me overall), I think a realistic position at this point is to cheerfully (or as much as I can muster) let go of the expectation and desire to be in romantic partnership at all. In other words, I think it is best to no longer make seeking or being in a romantic partnership a goal in my life and should plan, and expect, lifelong singledom. Is this position extreme?
submitted by ambaroot to relationships [link] [comments]


2020.11.27 03:45 ambaroot Thinking I (F28) should give up pursuing romantic relationships for the remainder of my life. Am I being extreme at all? Looking for some balanced perspectives.

A bit of background: I am a 28 year old female who has never been in a relationship, or even gone out on a date for that matter. I have been asked for my number a few times in real life (though I don’t really consider any of these requests to have been serious) but aside from that I haven’t really received any positive attention from the opposite sex, and have certainly not received such attention from the men I have found to be personally attractive (I rarely get crushes but when I do they are intense one sided scenarios, if you can even call them that, and they seem to wreck havoc on my life).
To give you a bit more information and to flesh out the picture a bit more: I have attempted online dating a few times (seems to be the only viable option I have since date offers aren’t exactly piling up lol) and my online dating experiences, like my IRL experiences, have been… uh, kind of tragic :D.
The (few) messages I received from men were always short, half-hearted, if not entirely copy-pasted, one sentence openers that often went (or implied they would go) nowhere… and they were nearly always from guys I didn’t find attractive. I don’t mean this to be “shallow” (especially since I realize that I am on the receiving end of this exact same criticism when it comes to the vast majority of male opinion) but I do think that if I am not even remotely interested in a person on a physical-attraction level… a romantic relationship, or even a date, is not something worth attempting. Similarly, there are a ton of “objectively” attractive guys I tend to pass on when using these apps (or even ignore/don’t really give attention to IRL) because objective good looks don’t translate into physical attraction for me as well. So, physical attraction is an important requisite for a date I guess… but it is worth noting that physical attractiveness itself will also be passed over if the person in question doesn’t seem compatible mentally or emotionally. I did eventually message a few of the men whose profiles interested me the most and was, in both cases, ignored by them.
So this all brings me to the reason why I made this post today and what I have been thinking about lately. I recently (few days ago) re-activated my dating profile to once again to try my hand at this slightly uncomfortable way of perhaps “finding” someone I appeal to who feels a reciprocal interest in me… for an eventual date. After perusing and swiping through thousands (probably) of men I ended up “liking” (right swiping) less than 10. Only two of those liked me back. Neither of them have messaged me or seem interested in doing so (likely because they swiped right on everyone)… and I am not interested in shooting them the first message as that has tended to not work in my favor before. So… this recent experience has made me reconfirm and in a sense finally really “accept” that I am not attractive to most men, and more importantly, that I don’t interest the few men who I find attractive myself. I expect my online dating experiences (if I continue them, which I am very nearly about to cease) to continue to be dismal, and my IRL (non)dating/relationship experiences to continue to likewise be bleak, and well, overall although I am not bitter or taking anything too personally (as I know that there are some men and women out there who find themselves in a similarly unenvied situation as this one) I find coming to the understanding or realization that I don’t appeal to those who most interest me so clearly again (it’s been a repeated theme all my life) at 28 after a lifetime of a void in the romantic department to be a little disheartening because, well, like everyone I do want to experience a mutually satisfying romantic partnership... and was hoping, eventually, I would. Being realistic however, in light of my recent and lifelong (and projected) experiences I am thinking it would be better to cease pursing romantic relationships at all.
Is this decision too extreme? To be clear, what I mean by "decision" is: I think I should decide to cease the pursuit of romantic partnerships (instead of trying and trying and and hoping against odds I’ll one day be successful where I have never been successful) and further I think I should should begin to adjust my life plans and expectations to one where I will be living single indefinitely. In other words: I think I should decide to stop making a romantic relationship one of my goals in life, period, and give my attention to other areas of life entirely. The reason why I wanted to post this question in here however (I don’t really have anyone I think I’d like to discuss this with IRL) before I “settle’ or sink into this decision is because I want to get outside thoughts, voices or opinion on this… whole thing. I am hoping in particular to get thoughts on whether or not my line of thinking is extreme or overeactive in anyway…. basically: if there was someone in my circumstance dealing with this same issue of not appealing to anyone they want to date I would tell them to 1) work on yourself to increase how desirable you are in order to better attract those who interest you, and/or 2) seek to adjust your expectations and date those who are more in your “range” of attractiveness, and/or 3) forgo relationships altogether if you genuinely cannot find someone you find attractive who feels similarly about you because romantic partnership, while highly desirable, is ultimately not necessary to live a good life.
In my case concerning 1) while I could develop my mind, character and emotional maturity overtime, I am basically in the 5 to 10 year age range where I will probably look the most decent I ever will in my entire life span (the “prime” of life as they say), and although I could make small adjustments to my appearance (I am of average weight, perhaps a little thinner than the average, dress in slightly fashionable but more comfortable clothing, and wear some minimal cosmetics) I do not think such changes will increase my immediate “desirability” much if at all, meaning, someone is not physically attracted to me now… probably wouldn’t change their opinion if I made minor changes. Where it concerns 2) I don’t know how appropriate this suggestion would be for me since, as mentioned, I don’t pursue people on the basis of objective good looks, but on what I find personally appeals to me and what I deem physical attractiveness (many of the sort of guys I find attractive are probably only average or slightly above average in looks) and even this marker itself is passed up on if/when other factors don’t seem to indicate compatibility. If I dated people who were “objectively” as attractive as me (or within a low range of appeal)… well, I would be hard pressed to find anyone at all for meeting the minimal “physical attractiveness” threshold. Which means then… if it seems to be the case that I can only realistically date people within my range of attractiveness, and if I find such individuals unattractive (in the same way most men, including those in this range find me unattractive)… it means I am either consistently looking to date people who are out of my range who don’t want to date me in return, or I am looking to date people who I do not find physically attractive and so... in fact, don't want to date. Whew… quite a jumble of words and sorry for being so rambly but this brings me to my last option.
3) forgo relationships altogether if you genuinely cannot find someone you find attractive who feels similarly about you because romantic partnership, while highly desirable, is not necessary live a good life.
This is exactly what I have concluded I should probably do and am leaning towards at this moment as much as, truthfully, it depresses me a bit to consider making such a choice. I tend think for my own wellbeing however, and in the long run, I will probably find more joy in life if I resolutely give up the (so far) exhausting, disappointing desire/pursuit for partnership. Is this position extreme at all? What do you guys think. Any advice?
TL;DR: I can’t get a date to save my life because I am secretly Ms. Frankenstein I guess (or some such creature) and so being that the only guys who pursue me are those within my “looks range” … and I do not find them physically attractive enough to want to date them (the same thing most men feel towards me overall), I think a realistic position at this point is to cheerfully (or as much as I can muster) let go of the expectation and desire to be in romantic partnership at all. In other words, I think it is best to no longer make seeking or being in a romantic partnership a goal in my life and should plan, and expect, lifelong singledom. Is this position extreme?
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