MORRISSETTE dating

My Buddy’s Letter to the Alabama Dept. Of Public Health

2020.09.15 18:34 kirklcd My Buddy’s Letter to the Alabama Dept. Of Public Health

Probably TLDR, but I wanted to post my buddy’s (u/anon-engineer) letter to Nancy Bishop, the State Pharmacy Director. He was having major issues trying to post, and he finally convinced me to post it for him. And just FYI, he doesn’t want people thinking that he’s bragging about his job or his salary. He only mentioned those in the letter to show how this poison can affect ANYONE. Both of us have been clean for about 2 weeks, and finding our “why” has definitely kept us mentally focused through the worst of it. We both had to reassess our moral compass, and just start doing what was RIGHT. We want to be good fathers, good husbands, and good men that provide for our families. And the only way to do that is by making permanent changes. No more excuses, no more “last dances” with the devil. It was time to nut up or shut up. Good luck to everyone embarking on this journey!
I am writing this letter to provide a detailed account of the extraordinarily negative impact Tianeptine has had on my life. Tianeptine is extremely dangerous, with thousands of individuals across Alabama having falsely assumed it as harmless because of its availability at every local gas station. Tianeptine began showing up on shelves as “Tianaa” (or “Za Za”, “Tiara”, “Tia-Max”, etc.) immediately following the ban of kratom within the state. The state believed they were snuffing out a problem by scheduling kratom, when in reality I believe they inadvertently unleashed an exponentially more dangerous drug onto the public.
For a little of my background, I am an upper management level engineer at a well-regarded company with a six-figure salary. I have a gorgeous stay-at-home wife and two beautiful children. With that said, I am by no means perfect, as I have also had issues with opioids dating back to injuries from high school. I am on the early side of middle-aged, but I have been able to progress up the company ranks despite my substance use issues. I was able to maintain my habit until I agreed to move in with my girlfriend (now wife) in 2014, and I realized I needed help. I quit cold-turkey and checked into an outpatient suboxone treatment plan. Part of this plan involved weekly counseling with Mr. Counselor, who was essential in my first, but not last, battle with opioids. After roughly a year, I successfully tapered down and eventually stopped the suboxone completely in 2015. At this point, my sessions with Mr. Counselor ceased, but I wanted to stay in touch in the event of anymore opioid issues down the road.
Following suboxone, I began taking kratom occasionally to help with pain from previous injuries, as well as to help with minor bouts of social anxiety. While I can most assuredly see the potential negative effects of kratom, I still viewed it as a net positive on my life because it was much better than the alternatives (oxycodone/hydrocodone), and essentially a natural alternative to suboxone. But then it was scheduled in 2016, leading me back to the bad habits I had previously put in my rear view mirror. For about two years, I bounced between buying oxys/hydros off the street and driving to FL or MS to buy kratom, all while my bad habits were running myself and my family into financial debt. I finally got control of my issues around the end of 2018, and had begun to dig myself out of debt, when I stumbled upon “Tianaa” at a gas station.
Looking back on it now, I literally had to pinch myself after trying it. These new products called “Tianaa” (or “Za Za”, “Tiara”, “Tia-Max”, etc.) were marketed as a replacement for kratom. They were in red, green, and white bottles, mimicking the different strains of kratom. They even claimed to subside opioid withdrawal symptoms. I honestly figured it was all false advertisement, but since it was at the gas station, I figured why not. $25 and 30 minutes later, I felt what seemed like a warm blanket laying across my shoulders. I had a couple months clean, but it honestly seemed like I just bumped into an old friend. I asked myself “How can this be legal? How can something this strong be legal, when something as mild as kratom was just scheduled?”
The recommended dosage on the bottle was 2 pills, which worked amazingly well for a few weeks. But I could definitely feel my tolerance begin to rise at a much higher rate than with typical opioids. Soon my dosage rose to 5 pills. Then 10 pills. Then the whole bottle of 15 pills. Then two bottles, sometimes three bottles. And this rapid increase in tolerance is entirely due to Tianeptine’s short acting effects. Eventually, taking a whole bottle felt like the equivalent of ~100 mg of oxycodone/hydrocodone. Within months, I was spending $50-75 a day buying these bottles from the gas station. I have an outstanding job, so I could have likely afforded this habit somewhat, but I wanted to keep it a secret from my wife after I had already put her through my initial substance abuse issues. And that’s where the evil of Tianeptine really comes into focus, as it is basically heroin you can buy at a gas station with a credit card.
Even through my initial opioid issues, my performance at work was never diminished. Regardless of any withdrawal symptoms I was experiencing, I still showed up to work and showed out from a performance standpoint. I received promotion after promotion, all while dealing with substance abuse problems in the backgorund. This continued through my kratom use, and even through my Tianeptine use. But there was one distinct difference with Tianeptine, and that is the mental aspect of withdrawal. It was growing harder and harder to focus at work. At this point in the story, I have risen to upper management and am actively involved with executives on a daily/weekly basis, as I am within reach of the top engineering position at my company. As my performance at work is dwindling, I finally start researching the ingredients of “Tianaa”. As it turns out, Tianeptine was never approved by the FDA, but it has been prescribed in low does (Stablon) for depression in Europe for quite some time. I see the dosages listed and compare them to the “proprietary blend” listed on the back of the gas station bottles. Conservative estimates are each pill sold in gas stations contains 50-75mg of Tianeptine, which is higher than the maximum prescribed dose in Europe! And I have been taking almost 50 of these damn pills a day! Upon this new revelation, I decided to quit cold-turkey again. But this time, I was blindsided by something I never expected.
Earlier in my story, I described Tianeptine as evil. Let me rephrase that, it is pure evil. I have taken numerous opioids over the years, and have never experienced anything that even remotely comes close to the mental hold this substance can have over you. This is the key difference between Tianeptine and traditional opioids, as Tianeptine is a prescribed anti-depressant with numerous other methods of action within the brain other than binding to mu-opioid receptors. The typical thoughts of an addict worrying about the next dose are amplified exponentially, and not having that next dose of Tianeptine will send you down into the deepest depression possible. The physical symptoms are par for the course with opioids: skin crawling, restlessness (legs, arms, body), hot/cold flashes, profuse sweating, insomnia, and all of the other acute flu-like symptoms. With traditional opioids, these are more “feeling under the weather” type symptoms, where they are present but I was always able to power through. But with Tianeptine, there is no powering through. I felt like absolute death for 3-5 days each time I attempted to quit. And I have honestly forgotten how many times I got to 5 days, because the post-acute withdrawal symptoms always reeled me back in. Many sleepless nights have come and gone, with me reading stories on the QuittingTianeptine subreddit, hearing stories from other poor souls going through the same thing as me. I have read multiple user accounts claiming that Tianeptine withdrawal is without a doubt worse than heroin. I read one account comparing Tianeptine withdrawal to someone with a 150-200 mg/day oxy habit that was also on Zoloft, and then quitting both simultaneously. Those other actions within the brain are so difficult to repair after taking 50x the dose on an anti-depressant (that just so happens to also be a mu-opioid agonist).
Shifting gears, let’s talk about the financial impact of this drug. Knowing the physical and mental addictive properties of this stuff, while factoring in the accessibility of it (at just about any gas station you walk into), it is set up to ruin people financially. My mistakes and misfortunes are going to take me years to recover from. As mentioned earlier, I have a six-figure salary, but this drug has emptied my savings accounts, caused me to take out 401k loans, and has put me in >$30k of credit card debt. This financial impact is felt not only by me but also by those I love. My poor wife is now totally reliant upon me to provide for her, and all I have done is dig a financial hole that seems insurmountable. With all that said, the first step towards helping myself and the thousands of others affected by this drug is to include on the scheduled substance list. With my Libertarian views, I am a firm believer in letting people ingest whatever they want whenever they want, as long as it does not affect their capability to be a benefit to society. However, this drug should be most assuredly be controlled. It is a foreign prescription drug that was previously tested by the FDA but failed to acquire approval. It is being falsely advertised aggressively towards people with a history of opioid abuse, leading myself and many others down a dark one-way path of ongoing mental battles, emotional issues, and undue financial stress.
In fact, not only should this substance be scheduled, but I believe the proprietors behind the companies preying on people should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. They knew all of the abuse potential associated with Tianeptine, and selectively chose a state where opioid abuse is rampant and kratom is illegal. Combining all of these factors together created the perfect storm, and they used this storm to turn a massive profit. How is this any different than what just happened with Purdue Pharma, after they created Oxycontin and falsely advertised it as safe while pushing it out into the public?
Using that train of thought, and after some internet investigations, I found one such proprietor by the name of Mr. James Morrissette of Cape Coral FL. Mr. Morrissette was heavily involved with the kratom industry, giving him the ideal viewpoint to plan and execute this scheme on the people of Alabama. He has used multiple different companies to distribute this poison (M&L Holdings, M&L Distribution, M&L Group, etc.), and more than likely to move his profits around to avoid taxes/fines/fees. Disgustingly, he also owns close to 20 different rehab facilities in Florida. He can literally make money off getting people addicted, then turn around and make money off trying to help the same addicts he created, basically creating an endless circle of cash flow that is completely void of any morals whatsoever. I mean, just imagine how much worse it would be for Purdue Pharma if they also owned rehab facilities?
Sorry, I was beginning to get long-winded, as this whole situation both angers me and saddens me at the same time. But in conclusion, I truly feel for all of those affected by this truly evil poison found at every gas station throughout our great state. To reiterate, I hold an engineering degree from a highly regarded university, I have excelled professionally while employed with a well-regarded company, and I have a wife and kids and dog and everything but a white picket fence. And even I fell into the grips of this drug. It has made a lasting impact both mentally and emotionally, and most definitely financially.
For Mrs. Bishop, this is a problem that requires action immediately. Rehab centers are full of patients attempting to quit these pills easily bought at a gas station. Emergency rooms are also seeing a massive influx of people associated with the pills, either from overdoses or from the extremely intense withdrawals. Tianeptine is a health concern right now, and I implore you to do the right thing for the citizens of Alabama, and take the necessary actions to end the availability of this purely evil poison.
Best Regards, Anonymous Engineer
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2020.04.23 21:00 autotldr Canada says one million face masks from China failed to meet proper standards, won’t be sent to provinces

This is the best tl;dr I could make, original reduced by 73%. (I'm a bot)
The Canadian government says about one million face masks it purchased from China failed to meet proper standards for health care professionals and will not be distributed to provinces or cities.
The Public Health Agency is screening all medical supplies it's buying right now, and these masks were supposed to be rated to the KN95 standards for respirators.
The federal Department of Health says KN95 masks are an acceptable alternative to N95 models but the masks in question did not meet the required filtering standards for N95-type masks, which are rated to capture 95 per cent of tiny particles.
"Due to intense global competition for personal protective equipment and medical supplies, countries are engaging with a diverse number of new suppliers and manufacturers to meet the demands of the COVID-19 response effort. As a result, agency is conducting its due diligence on products procured by PSPC, verifying the quality of procured and donated supplies upon receipt," said Eric Morrissette, a spokesman for the Department of Health and Canada's Public Health Agency.
"To date, PHAC has identified approximately one million KN95 masks as non-compliant with specifications for health care settings. These items were not distributed to provinces and territories for frontline health care response, and are being subsequently assessed for use in non-health care settings."
Mr. Matthews said Ottawa has ordered more than 293 million surgical masks and more than 130 million N95 respirators.
Summary Source FAQ Feedback Top keywords: masks#1 health#2 supply#3 China#4 country#5
Post found in /worldnews.
NOTICE: This thread is for discussing the submission topic. Please do not discuss the concept of the autotldr bot here.
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2020.03.13 02:45 antdude Zack Morrissette on Instagram: “Dating is harder when you might get eaten at the bar…”

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2020.01.20 15:16 sgerken Official ACL 2020 Lineup Speculation Thread

Welcome to the Official ACL 2020 Lineup Speculation Thread!

Last update: March 9th @ 9:45pm EST
As I did last year, this will be our ongoing hub of all things rumors, predictions, who’s in/who’s out, etc until we get the lineup in May. Last year, we tracked 9 of 10 headliners well over a month before the lineup dropped, in addition to many others in the undercard.
Quick notes on my process:
  • I am assuming acts that play in Central Texas in early May or before to be in play. There is precedence (albeit a limited one) for acts to play in May and still make it on the bill.
  • I will not include any acts that played ACL in the past two years. While I know there are some very limited cases of artists playing twice in a three-year span, it would be overkill to include the 300+ acts when 99% of them are out.
  • I will use my discretion to determine the validity of a source/rumor. Sorry in advance if you disagree.
Lastly, if you have any updates you’d like to be reflected, feel free to comment below or DM me.
Our categories are:
  • Confirmed: Confirmations straight from the festival, artist, or other directly-affiliated sources
  • Expected: Renaming last year's “all-but-confirmed” category. These are artists that would be a surprise if they do NOT end up playing for whatever reason
  • Logical: Not enough evidence to mark Expected but enough to raise interest beyond Possible; would make sense to see them on the lineup but one could make a plausible case either way
  • Rumored: Chatter from fans, playing other festivals, rumored to be touring, etc. Take this with a massive grain of salt, please
  • Possible: No reason to believe they’re out, but no reason to suspect they’re likely
  • Out: Conflicting tour dates, etc

Confirmed

Artist Reasoning/Notes Source
We have nothing in this section...yet

Expected

Artist Reasoning/Notes Source
Asleep At The Wheel They've played every year and there is no reason to expect otherwise in 2020 :)
Barton Hill Choir The real stars of ACL year in and year out. They'll be there...next.
Maren Morris Only one show (Rogers, AR on 10/9) between 10/1 date in Tuscaloosa and 10/15 date in San Diego. Playing BottleRock & Gov Ball and looks like she’ll be at Lolla as well. Only other Texas date is Houston Rodeo in early March. She’ll likely play Sunday. Tour Dates
Vampire Weekend ACL-sized gap during tour with no Austin dates. Also playing Bonnaroo, Gov Ball, Okeechobee, Lolla EU and Lolla LATAM. Tour Dates

Logical

Artist Reasoning/Notes Source
Bikini Kill No Texas dates and have an ACL-sized gap between dates in Birmingham and Denver. However, they could also be slated to play Levitation, therefore we're not considering them as Expected. Tour Dates
Pearl Jam Playing Lolla EU and other smaller festivals. Playing Eddy Vedder's own Ohana Festival the weekend before ACL in California. Spring dates (which have now since been postponed) skipped Texas entirely. Rumored as a possible Lolla headliner. Tour Dates
Rage Against The Machine Playing Coachella, Boston Calling and Firefly. Tour does not reach Texas (or the south for that matter) and "ends" in Europe in mid-September. Reports are this tour will be politically-driven and playing Texas a month before the elections would make sense. Tour Dates
Zac Brown Band Just one Texas date (DFW) on an 8-month tour that touches almost every part of the country. No dates announced from 9/26 to 10/18. One could assume they’ll be in Texas then and ACL could make sense. Tour Dates

Rumored

Artist Reasoning/Notes Source
We have nothing in this section...yet

Possible

Artist Reasoning/Notes Source
Ari Lennox Playing Coachella and Buku Tour Dates
Cage The Elephant Playing Lolla LATAM, Hangout and Sweetwater 420 Tour Dates
Calvin Harris Playing Coachella Tour Dates
Carly Rae Jepsen Playing Coachella and Gov Ball Tour Dates
DaBaby Playing Coachella Tour Dates
Danny Caesar Playing Coachella Tour Dates
Dave Matthews Band Tour ends in Mississippi 8 days before W1 and does not hit Texas. Playing BottleRock. Tour Dates
Disclosure Playing Coachella and III Points Tour Dates
Fatboy Slim Playing Coachella Tour Dates
FKA Twigs Playing Coachella Tour Dates
Flume Playing Coachella, Bonnaroo, Ultra and Buku Tour Dates
Foo Fighters Playing Jazz Fest, Boston Calling and Oshega Tour Dates
Glass Animals Playing Bonnaroo, Okeechobee and Buku Tour Dates
Jimmy Eat World Tour with noo Texas dates ends in early-September Tour Dates
Kendrick Lamar Playing Lolla Sweden and Oshega Tour Dates
King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard Playing Coachella & Bonnaroo Tour Dates
Lana Del Rey Playing Coachella and Bonnaroo Tour Dates
Leon Bridges Playing Bonnaroo and Oshega Tour Dates
Lionel Richie Playing Jazz fest Tour Dates
Madeon Playing Lolla LATAM, Coachella, Oshega, Gov Ball, Hangout and Ultra. No Texas dates. Tour Dates
Maggie Rogers Playing Jazz Fest and BottleRock Tour Dates
Marina Playing Coachella Tour Dates
Miley Cyrus Playing Bonnaroo, Gov Ball and BottleRock Tour Dates
Missy Elliot Playing Gov Ball Tour Dates
Oysterhead Playing Bonnaroo and Sweetwater 420 Tour Dates
Portugal. The Man Playing Gov Ball and Shaky Knees Tour Dates
Red Hot Chili Peppers Playing Boston Calling, Hangout and BottleRock Tour Dates
Roger Waters Tour ends in Dallas on 10/3, could play Friday or Saturday. No Austin date on tour. Should be noted that he rarely plays back-to-back dates, which would be the case if he did play ACL. Tour Dates
Rufus Du Sol Playing Gov Ball and Lolla Paris. Playing Germania on 3/14 which makes their odds very slim Tour Dates
Run The Jewels Playing Coachella, Bonnaroo and Buku. Touring with RATM and skipping Texas on current tour. Tour Dates
Seven Lions Playing Bonnaroo Tour Dates
Stevie Nicks Playing Jazz Fest, Gov Ball, BottleRock and Jazz Aspen Tour Dates
Summer Walker Playing Coachella and Gov Ball Tour Dates
Tenacious D Playing Bonnaroo Tour Dates
Tipper Playing Bonnaroo and Okeechobee Tour Dates
Tool Playing Bonnaroo, but January date at Frank Erwin makes them less likely Tour Dates
The Who Playing Jazz Fest. Dates in Dallas and Houston in April likely rules them out but we’re still tracking the legendary rockers Tour Dates
Young The Giant Playing Bonnaroo Tour Dates

Out

Artist Reasoning/Notes Source
The 1975 Touring in Europe Tour Dates
The Airborne Toxic Event Playing Emo’s 5/29 Emo’s Schedule
Alanis Morrissette Playing Germania 6/12 Germania Schedule
Andrew McMahon Playing Stubbs 6/13 Stubbs Schedule
AWOLNATION Playing Stubbs 6/13 Stubbs Schedule
Bassnectar Playing Camp Nowhere in Austin 6/21 Line Up
The Black Crowes Playing Germania 6/17 Germania Schedule
The Black Keys Playing Germania 7/19 Tour Dates
Brooks & Dunn Playing Las Vegas residency during W2 Tour Dates
Dead & Company Already announced their "only" dates this year and ACL was not on the list. Article
Death Cab For Cutie Playing ACL Live 5/21 and 5/22 ACL Live Schedule
Frank Ocean Coachella exclusive is his only 2020 dates, confirmed by Gov Ball promoters Link to AMA
Foreigner Playing Germania 9/13 Germania Schedule
Kaleo Playing Bass Concert Hall on 10/6 Tour Dates
KISS Playing Germania 10/1 Germania Concert Schedule
Kraftwerk Playing ACL Live 7/1 Tour Dates
Louis Tomlinson Playing ACL Live 7/10 ACL Live Schedule
The Lumineers Playing Frank Erwin 9/18 Emo’s Schedule
Maroon 5 Playing Germania 6/7 Germania Schedule
My Chemical Romance Touring west coast during ACL Tour Dates
Rod Stewart Playing Las Vegas residency during W1 Tour Dates
Steely Dan Playing ACL Live 5/26 and 5/27 ACL Live Schedule
Stormzy Playing in Africa during ACL Tour Dates
The Strokes Playing Germania 5/9 Tour Dates
Ty Segall Playing Mohawk 10/9 Mohawk Schedule
The Weeknd Playing four Texas dates, including San Antonio in mid-August. Also, Europe tour starts Sunday of W2. Tour Dates
Thanks for your interest and help keeping this up-to-date and accurate!
Days Until ACL 2020: 207
Included in last update:
  • Added to Logical: Pearl Jam
  • Added to Possible: Jimmy Eat World
  • Added to Out: The Strokes
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2020.01.11 15:42 McIgglyTuffMuffin r/popheads Album of the Decade #11: Paramore - Paramore

PARAMORE – PARAMORE
Release date: April 5, 2013
Album Cover
Deluxe Version Album Cover
Produced by Justin Meldal – Johnsen & select tracks (2, 3, 6 and 16) by Taylor York
Band Members:
Hayley Williams
Jeremy Davis
Taylor York
Singles –
  1. Now – January 22, 2013
  2. Still Into You - March 14, 2013
  3. Daydreaming – December 2, 2013
  4. Ain’t It Fun – February 4, 2014
a. Video directed by Sophia Peer b. Best Rock Song – 57th Grammy Awards i. Hayley became the first woman to win the award since Alanis Morrissette in 1999
It’s funny, I shouldn’t like Paramore like I do. I shouldn’t, I should actually probably loathe the ever-loving hell out of Hayley and co., I have too many bad memories associated with them, but they keep coming along and slapping me across the face with greatness.
Imagine this, it’s like 2005 or something. I’m a sophomore in high school. There I am in my black skinny jeans, long hair, and a t-shirt from Hot Topic, either Led Zeppelin or Metallica but what matters is the shirt is black. Like my soul. I get home from school and immediately go to the computer room, remember computer rooms? (Of course you don’t, you were all like 4 in 2005.) I turn the beast on and wait for it to boot, I get signed in and double click on the icon for AOL Instant Messenger or AIM as the cool kids called it. I see who on my Buddy ListTM is signed on and I see my girlfriend at the time is on but away, “Hanging out with Kevin and Kirsten, have work later, catch me there.” Normal to me, I had plans to visit her and get some ice cream from the ice cream shop she worked at. But I scroll down and see she had changed the lyrics in her Buddy ProfileTM, they were lyrics I was unfamiliar with.
If you’re unfamiliar with computer instant messaging in the midaughts these profiles were E V E R Y T H I N G. Mostly they were just filled with song lyrics that reflected how you were feeling, how great your school sports team was doing or dumb little jokes. It was a good time. I read the lyrics in my then-girlfriend’s profile.
Cause I've seen love die way too many times When it deserved to be alive (It deserved to be alive) I've seen you cry way too many times When you deserved to be alive, alive I Googled and found out that it was a song called Emergency by a band from Franklin, Tennessee called Paramore. I thought the song was fine, I really didn’t focus on the lyrical content, but I should have because it was a precursor to a breakup. We broke up literally the next day.
For comparison sake these were the lyrics I had in my buddy profile at the time:
We live happily ever trapped If you just save my life Run and tell the angels That everything is all right
Flashforward
The year is 2014. I’m at the Monumentour with my sister, her best friend and my girlfriend at the time. This was the show that made me a Paramore fan. Before this I liked Paramore but they weren’t the first band I reached for when scrolling down my iPod Classic, in black of course. Seeing Hayley live changed everything for me. But again, I was with a girl who in a very short time would not only break my heart but emotionally destroy me.
It’s May of 2015. I’m driving to Atlantic City to see Paramore on the Writing the Future tour. I’m traveling with two friends from work. I have a thing with the one girl, it’s more or less ending, but we as people were still on good terms. She ended up getting married a few months after this show. (And yes, I was invited to the wedding.)
We jump again
It’s late2017. I’m on a bed with a girl as she plays 26 on her ukulele. Another Paramore record. Another Paramore song. Another girl who didn’t work out.
There’s no other band that I have this connection with when it comes to relationships. I should shun Paramore at every turn because I know it means heartache. (Paramore pls release Paramore6 and destroy me again, thanks.) But I can’t. I keep coming back to Paramore, day after day, time after time and for good reason. They just know how to write music that is relatable, that is catchy, that makes me want to keep listening. I think part of it is the age difference, there isn’t much. Hayley is 3 years older than I am, Taylor is 2 years older than I am, Zac is barely a year older than I. So the things they’re going through are the things I’m going through, and that connection can’t be broken. And even more personal, Hayley loves the kind of music that I love. Her favorite band is the Philadelphia based post-hardcore group MewithoutYou. While I don’t specially love MWY, I love the genre and of course I love their city.
In April of 2013 the band that released their self-titled album though wasn’t comprised of Hayley Williams, Zac Farro and Taylor York though. The Self-Titled era line up comprised of Hayley Williams on vocals and pianos, Jeremy Davis on bass guitar and Taylor York on literally everything else. (Okay, not literally everything but basically.) Rounding out the band in the studio was Ilan Rubin on drums and Justin Meldal-Johnsen as producer and various percussion. (Fun fact: Ilan and Justin both played in Nine Inch Nails for a time, so thinking about it that is a strange vibe to bring to Paramore of all bands, but it worked.)
Between brand new eyes and the Self-Titled Record Paramore would see themselves go from a 5 piece band to the 3 piece that ultimately released the record. On December 18, 2010 a message released through Paramore.net stated that the brothers Josh, guitar, and Zac, drums, Farro were departing the band. A few days later Josh Farro released his fiery own statement. This left the future of the band in doubt, especially as they were about to go on another tour leg, but the remaining members said they were dedicated and would keep touring and keep releasing tracks. This strength as a threesome eventually was reflected in the new branding of the band, they adopted a simple geometric logo that was comprised of three bars. One for each member.
But like my love for the band, the band has endured, and in the Spring of 2013 Paramore released Paramore and the Self-Titled era had arrived. And in a big way.
I’m not going to tackle all the tracks here, and I apologize if I skip something that is your favorite, I’ve never been the best at describing music. I can describe my thoughts and feelings towards the songs, but I can’t really articulate it in musical terms. It’s probably why I was a drummer and it probably is for the same reason I was never able to do abstractions in math class.
Select album tracks:
Fast in My Car
Boom kick snare, boom kick snare, boom kick snare. A guitar riff that knocks you on your butt. A lyric that punches you across the face. Fast in My Car opens the album and sets the story straight, it’s us three against the world and we’re going to do everything that we can to continue our take over. It’s a constant theme that runs through this album. Paramore got personal in the past, but I truly feel that Paramore took a huge risk with this album and went more personal than ever. And that theme continued into their next record, After Laughter and we can only hope it continues into Hayley’s new record (Petals for Armor something is coming January 22, if you are unaware.)
Now
Now was our first taste of Paramore after brand new eyes and it was a shot to the chest. If you hadn’t been paying attention it was your first taste of Paramore since Playing God debuted in November of 2010. To those a little more in tune with the current of the times it was the first song since November 2011 when Paramore released In the Mourning, the final of three tracks released from The Singles Club. Either way you were transported into an entirely new world. I very clearly remember my first thought upon hearing Now, “Wow, this sounds like No Doubt.” I really don’t know why I thought this, because comparing Now to No Doubt as an entire entity there really isn’t any similarities. I was, and most likely still am, a dumb ass back in January of 2013.
Like Fast in My Car this song is another kick ass alt rock song that retains their pop punk sensibilities that were all over their debut and Riot!, but it’s also grown up. Which is pretty interesting since the next track is literally called Grow Up. Even if I’m not talking about Grow Up, whoops.
Interlude: Moving On
Paramore includes three ukulele interludes on the album and for an album this size, 17 tracks, I think it’s important to have these cleansers between the different sections of the album. The first four tracks are pretty much standard Paramore fare. This is what you expected out of them.
Then this track hits. I know I scratched my head the very first time I heard this track. A uke on a Pmore track? Yeah, okay, acoustic I can understand, but a ukulele? Alright then.
I didn’t love this album the very first time I heard it. Actually, I downright hated it the first time. I had a very narrow-minded view of what Paramore was as a band this record took a wrecking ball to that notion. They bamboozled me. But they introduced me to some of the finest damn music I have ever heard in my life.
Ain’t It Fun
I don’t really know if I have anything to say about this song that hasn’t already been said since it was released to the world. If you know, you know. And in a world where we may no longer get Misery Business this is a worthy successor, at least I think. If you’ve never stood in a crowd while you’re all screaming Ain’t It Fun then you’re missing a very key piece of your life and I suggest that the next time Paramore comes rolling through your town you check them out. (Even if this track is somehow not played you won’t be disappointed because like I said they put on a hell of a show.)
Ain’t it Fun though is the first real departure from the band’s signature sound. They embrace the pop of pop punk or punk pop or whatever you want to call it. And they nail it. From the piano riff to the xylophone phone every note is perfect and every note makes you want to hear more. Once this was released as a single I heard it all the time on the radio, and you know what? I didn’t care. It was a song I was always excited to hear and a song I always blasted when my locals played it.
Last Hope
If you know one thing about me know this, I don’t watch music videos. Sure, if it exists I’ll watch it once and then never again. And usually I don’t even give live videos the time of day, it just isn’t for me. But this? This version of Last Hope from the Monumentour I find myself coming back to again and again and again. Even now almost 6 years later. It encapsulates everything that I love about this song. Hayley’s voice is on point and it lets the emotion of the song just shine through.
Like Ain’t it Fun, this song plays with the classic Paramore sound a bit. Sure, we’ve gotten this pseudo sort of ballad in the past but nothing like this. Everything from the music to the lyrics to Hayley’s own voice just seems so much more mature. This song is a reminder to myself, and others, that eventually things are all going to be alright. You got to let it happen.
Still Into You
Look, I enjoy this song, but I really don’t want to talk about it but I feel like I need to at least touch on it because it’s a single and it brings some humanity to this record in a different way. Songs like this are interesting because it helps you remember that music is written by real people and it isn’t just spat out by a computer, or at least it shouldn’t be. It helps remind you that life is ever changing and you really never know where and how you’ll end up next, good or bad.
Still Into You was written by Hayley about her then fiancé Chad Gilbert, from pop punk band New Found Glory.
Since the record was released, they got married and also got divorced. To my knowledge, which could be wrong, Hayley is currently single and Chad recently proposed to a new girl. Hayley was younger than Chad, and this new girl is even younger than Hayley. So big yikes right there on Chad’s part. It’s a fun song but it’s just so hard for me to listen to, I can’t disconnect, I’m jealous if you can. Chad is just a shit bag and while I was never a fan of NFG I did enjoy a handful of tracks and his predatory behavior really turned me off completely. My Friends Over You, more like Paramore and their Feelings Over You.
Hate to See Your Heart Break
I’m gonna be honest, this is the only track on the album I don’t like. It just doesn’t do it for me. And I was sad when the deluxe edition was released and we got two versions of this track. At the end of the day this song can only be defined as “fine.”
(One of Those) Crazy Girls
Probably one of the most interesting songs on the album because it’s so not Paramore’s vibe. In music nor in lyrics, and I think that’s part of the reason I’m so intrigued by it and in love with it. It’s almost jazzy. You’d expect to hear this crooned in a very smokey and very seedy night club off the beaten path. In my mind I just seeing a woman on a stage lit by a single light in a Jessica Rabbit type dress and a feather boa. You sit there with your two fingers of whiskey and wonder “Is this girl playing a character right now or is this how she really is?” But at the same time you say fuck it, and go for her anyway.
When I saw Paramore on the Writing the Future tour this track was the biggest surprise in the setlist for me.
My long term ex-girlfriend also really really loved this song, I should have taken it as some sort of weird sign. I kid. A bit.
Be Alone
The intro guitar part, and really the guitar throughout the whole of this song is one of those things that dreams are made of. It reverberates not only through the track but also through my mind. I have a couple of songs that play in my head when nothing is going on and the intro to Be Alone is one of them.
Besides the guitar I’m a real big fan of how hard hitting the drums are mixed in this song. The snare has a pop that isn’t like any other pop on the record, the cymbal splashes are the same. The harmonies near the end of the song really put it over the top too. I’m a sucker for female fronted rock bands partly because I love the combo of a male and female voice together. And turn that into gang vocals and boy you got a stew cooking and I’m ready to visit for dinner.
It gives it such an extra oomph! And it really plays into the very next track and how spacey it is. You have this tight monster of a song that is fast pace and exciting and a lot of snare rolls and then you hit the next track, but first with almost a level of silence that drives you crazy.
Future
Future, the final track of the standard edition is a great track. Neigh, an amazing track. It’s tied for my favorite Paramore song of all time. (The other song is also on this record.) While much of the record was a departure from their established sound, which has roots in the previous record brand new eyes and would follow on their next record After Laughter, Future takes that weirdness and runs with it. Runs far away with it. But Paramore would go to even greater lengths to do that on their next record as well. After Laughter includes the amazing and perfect track No Friend; in this essay within an essay I will begin to dissect why….
Anyways, where was I?
Future starts and stops, it’s sparse and it is full at the same time. This is one track I’ve always had trouble explaining to people. It’s Paramore if Paramore decided to be a jam band and it somehow absolutely works and is them at their very best. They played this song on the Writing the Future tour as the encore song and seeing and hearing it was as a religious experience. I was in awe at that performance and I think about it all the time. I’ve seen a lot of concerts in my 28 years and most of those were things that happened. Future on the Writing the Future tour is something that is part of me and has shaped me to this day. That’s weird as hell to say, but it’s true. This song just makes me want to be a better human being. There are other songs on this record that state that more explicitly through the lyrics but you know when a song hits you in the right way, well Future does that to me.
Escape Route
Escape Route is tied with Future as my other favorite song on the record and tied as my favorite Paramore song. It’s a shame that it is bonus track and not in the main track list, but I understand why. It’s pure pop punk, as well as the other two bonus tracks Native Tongue and Tell Me It’s Okay, and they wouldn’t fit the vibe of the record. This may be a Paramore record but it isn’t a pop punk record. It’s pop punk, but aged like a nice red wine. Lyrically the song hits me in the right way and one of my favorite lines in the song
I’m in all the echoes that have faded out
became a rally cry on a piece of Paramore merch that I feel lucky to own, and still own and still wear.
You know, I really should have done something for every track, I wanted to, but life got in the way. Life is dumb. We should all just lay in the forest and camp and just listen to music, life would be more perfect that way.
And that’s that. I love this record with my entire heart. I think embracing this album and embracing this band for who they became helped me to appreciate music in a much broader sense, it helped me realize that you don’t always have to stay in your neatly defined musical box. You can take your influences and meld them with your sound, you can explore new sounds, you can stay the same. And you can do them all together on the same record and have it all be cohesive. I think that’s the true sign of a great band, not only making a cohesive record but one that is sonically all over the place and still being One ThingTM.
This album is 17 tracks long and never once have I ever felt that it felt too long. Every listen, except maybe the first few, it feels too short. I could listen to this record every day for the rest of my life and I don’t think I’ll ever get bored of it. I’ll always find some new nuance in it, some new note that Hayley sings or Taylor strums that I somehow never caught the first time, or maybe I did catch it and I just appreciate it in a new way.
I never imagined that the band who released Emergency or MizBiz or That’s What You Get would evolve into this beast that they are now. To tell you the truth, I thought they were a fad. After I learned who they were I was so certain they were going to burn out bright and. But they didn’t, and I’m happy for that. I’ve now seen Paramore 4 times and each show just out does the last. I’ve vowed to myself that as long as they tour I’m never going to miss a show. I’ll be there belting out Ain’t It Fun until my last dying breath. See you in the pit. (Yes, Pmore shows somehow end up having a pit, they may have strayed a bit from their Warped Tour roots, but they fans haven’t.)
Bonus Round During the Self Titled touring cycle I was lucky enough to have seen Paramore on two different tours, which I mentioned above. For fun, here’s the setlists to those shows.
Monumentour – Camden, NJ
Writing the Future – Atlantic City, NJ
Discussion Questions
  1. If you’re old like me what were your first impressions of this album based on the material Paramore had put out before it?
  2. Where do you think Paramore is headed next after After Laughter, and after Hayley’s solo record? Or, are you one of those who believe the band is done and it’s Zac and Half Noise while Hayley is off on her own and Taylor is out here just producing records?
  3. Do you genuinely enjoy when a band completely flips the script and does something out of left field, like Future or No Friend, or do you prefer for them to stick to one style?
  4. When Paramore burst on the scene they were led by a small fireball with a head full of bright orange locks, through the years the shade has changed and with the Self-Titled era Hayley really began to experiment with her hair color. Even eventually launching a hair dye brand! What’s your favorite Hayley hair look?
At the end of all of this I feel so bad for focusing mostly on Hayley. I truly didn’t mean to. I’m not one to read or watch interviews so when it comes to my favorite artists I’m pretty in the dark. I mean, let’s put it this way, as much as I love Taylor I still don’t know all the details on the whole Taylor and Kanye thing that led to Tay writing Reputation. Yeah, that’s how not in the know I can be, it just isn’t stuff that interests me. All I know is Paramore makes me feel stuff and I hope they make you feel something too.
Happy Saturday, dudes. Have a good one!
submitted by McIgglyTuffMuffin to popheads [link] [comments]


2019.08.13 00:44 not-moses Digital (and printed) (and video) Literature

There is a fair amount of "overlap" in this collection of articles, OPs and replies to others on Reddit, but if you plow through it all slowly, it's pretty likely you'll know a LOT about the topic and what you can do about it.
The lyrics while listening to Alanis Morrissette's "Precious Illusions," "Death of Cinderella," and "Not the Doctor"
“I Can’t Function Without Love!” in not-moses’s reply to the OP on that thread
Modern Romance in the Millennial World of Pseudo-Intimate Dodge Ball
“Addicted to Love” (in not-moses’s reply to the OP on that Reddit thread) which gets into the hormonal chemistry that causes WITHDRAWAL
Are Most of us Trained to be Suckers for Romance? in not-moses's reply on that thread citing u/ProcessFiend's earlier posts
Is the Codependent "Love Addict" just a Commercial & Cultural Creation?
Will the Addict Ever Stop Using SOMETHING if He or She remains Depressed, Anxious or Shameful?, especially once those emotions become part of the Cycle of Addiction
"Can't live with 'em; can't live without 'em" – Codependency, the Drama Triangle, and the "Dark Diagnosis"
How to Handle Relationship Withdrawal
The Mirror of Relationship
Facing the Facts about Sex, Love & Romance in Our Time
The Road Out of Ultra-Codependent, Hyper-Stimulation-Seeking, Self-Medicating, Sex & Romance Addiction in not-moses's replies to the OP on that thread (because it IS possible to have a romantic relationship without being obsessive)
DEEP Cleaning for Sex, Romance & Relationship Addiction (there entitled "Recovery Experience")
"Love is being with what IS in relationship."
The Mindful Return to Romantic Relationship in not-moses’s reply to the OP on that Reddit thread
Pia Mellody's Facing Love Addiction
Anne Wilson Schaef's Escape from Intimacy on the same topic
Jiddu Krishnamurti's On Relationship
Patrick Carnes's Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction and Don't Call it Love: Recovery from Sexual Addiction
And for the scientifically minded, Harold Shaffer et al's Toward a Syndrome Model of Addiction: Multiple Expressions, Common Etiology; in the Harvard Review of Psychiatry, Vol. 12, 2004.
submitted by not-moses to loveaddiction [link] [comments]


2018.03.15 14:04 Wcuprz1 The Canadashank Redemption - Coops Monday Dump vol3

Actually putting in the right place this time....
The accompanying Jam: https://youtu.be/EJEYqIHYBXs
Patience awoke deep within his nest of rags from a luxurious 6 hours of sleep. Today was the day. Just 1 more 15 hour grind deep in the MMR mines of Canada and he was making his escape. His team was ready, his knapsack packed, and there was nothing else to do but see it through. Patience stretched one last time, squirming into his burlap gitch and pinned his gleaming “Divine” medal to his tunic to begin his short walk to breakfast. He was so focused on the plan and what was to come, that he almost ruined everything before it began – by bumping into someone else, who then bumped into a 3rd person. In traditional Canadian culture the apology and “excuse me” circle could go on for hours, and Patience simply did not have that kind of time.
Tapping his shiny new Divine badge Patience excused himself from the circle, uttering apologies that his apology was not appropriately apologetic and that he must beg their forgiveness at a later date for his rudeness. Choruses of apologies at delaying him followed Patience down the hall, but he was back on his way after only a 6 minute delay. Entering the dining hall, Patience grabbed his tray of Poutine and a Timmy’s Coffee (double-double) and proceeded to join those in on the plan at the table. Just as he was about to dig in, Auto Attacks cleared his throat – “Patience eh, you forgot the prayer. Don’t need the Keeners knowing what we are aboot now”. That was 2 mistakes just this morning, Patience needed to get it together. “Sorry aboot that” mumbled Patience. Bending his head and clasping his hands he recited the rite of the Canadian - as he had every morning since arriving at the gulag. “Hail Gaben, full of grace, hallowed be your game. My queue be done, my MMR come, in US East as well as US West servers. Give us today my daily Poutine. And forgive us our feeds, as we forgive those who feed when partied with us. Lead us not into the ranks of the culled, but let us lead Canada to dota2 glory - Amen”.
Finishing his gravy covered sustenance, Patience bid his colleagues luck and hurried off to his training pod. His path took him passed the intake center where Patience glimpsed a pack of squalling new arrivals. The children’s ruddy and tear stained cheeks framed their red eyes and Patience could still see himself in that crowd. It was a hard fact of Canadian life, but if you were deemed unfit for Hockey success by the age of 5, you were dumped into the Dota2 mines by parents who had given up on you. If you were able to grind your way to Divine 5, you would be released and welcomed back into Canadian society with a two-four of Molson’s and a few apologies. If you couldn’t grind to the elite ranks of Dota 2, you were culled. It was as simple as that – or had been until now.
Now Patience had a 3rd option. By teaming up with Auto Attacks, Zamoxles, and Erock they could escape the mines. They would never follow the path of Unity or LaLa and escape on their own merits, but they would get out, and that’s all that mattered. Just one more grind to get through and they could make their play. Arriving at his training Pod Patience finished his Tim Hortons double-double and climbed in for a paltry 15 hour grind session.
Patience knew something was wrong when he was allowed a break after a mere 6 games, typically you got 1 break around the 8 hour mark whether you needed it or not. Climbing out of his pod he saw one of the keeners, Dark, traipsing down the hall holding Mertank by the arm. Dark as a divine 4/5 who played tier 2 competitively could have escaped, but chose to stay as part of the aristocracy. “Now now Mertank, there’s nothing to fear” drawled dark “we just want to discuss why you are still stuck down in legend – nothing to worry aboot”. At that moment both Dark and Mertank locked eyes with Patience and a grin grew across Darks face. “Oh Patience, we don’t need you…. Yet. Although now that I think of it, we may need to discuss that 3k party MMR. I was just walking Mertank down to talk to Gu3st, maybe after that eh?”. Patience’s mind raced - talk to... Gu3st? But Gu3st had been culled months ago. No…. He was going to cull Mertank! As dawning crashed across Patience face he began to step forward. “No” shouted Mertank. “Its fine. I was never any good on anything but centaur, no matter how much you coached me. All I had was my Centaur”. Patience climbed back in his pod, its all he could do. He would complete the session and then he was gone.
Meeting over their evening Poutine and Molson’s, Patience looked around at the waiting eyes of the team. “Are we ready”? Auto nodded, Zamo looked sick but still replied “Ready as I’ll ever be”, and Erock moved his trembling hand into a thumbs up. Well – Let’s do it lads. One deep breath and then pandemonium reigned supreme. “Il teach you to accuse me of fornicating with a goose” “Syrup sucking Hoosier!” “I’m not even sorry I hurt your feelings!” “you call that a Molson’s muscle? More like a Labatt lard lump” “Gretzky wouldn’t set those records into today’s NHL”. That did it – the final sin in Canadaland. The guards came down hard on the culprits and heaved Patience, Erock, Zamoxles, and Auto Attacks apart – simultaneously apologizing for interrupting their fun and beating them senseless.
When Patience came to he was in the black cells, just him and a goose. Just as he planned. Deftly dodging the pecks of that feathered demon, Patience went to the far right corner where the toilet connected to the wall. A corner mirrored in each of the 4 black cells. A corner where if all 4 pipes in all 4 corners were broken open, a body could slip through to the larger sewer pipes below. Excitement building, Patience began to tap out the passcode “Look at this photograph” – “Every time it makes me laugh” came the response. Good, Erock was in the cell to the right. A few more seconds passed and then “How did our eyes get so red” was tapped out to Patiences left. Then nothing. Where was Zamoxles? They needed all 4 to pull this off. “And what the heck is on Jimmy’s head!”. Finally the last verses of the venerable Nickelback came tapping through the walls. Time to execute.
Erock and Zamo began the melodious warbling’s of Justin Bieber to draw the guards attention as Patience and Auto Attacks waited. It only took 3 verses before the guards had joined in, how could they resist? Every time the guards belted out the word “Baby” Patience and Auto hit the waste pipe. It only took 4 renditions of the Bieber ballad before they were through. Time to switch it up. Patience and Auto now lured the guards into an Alanis Morrissett sing along as Erock and Zamo hacked through their portions. With the last dying lines of “Ironic”, the 4 slipped into the waste pipe and down to the sewers. Once in the sewers they each went their separate ways; the sewers twisted, turned and split without reason - it was every man for himself. I will spare my readers the grizzly details of the foul journey through Canadian sewers. Let’s just say that a steady diet of gravy, syrup, beer, bacon, and Nanaimo bars does not lead to a healthy digestive tract. Emerging into rain Patience dropped to his knees to let the water wash away the repulsive slurry of human waste and to baptize him to freedom.
submitted by Wcuprz1 to redditdota2league [link] [comments]


2018.03.14 18:01 Wcuprz1 The Canadashank Redemption - Coops Monday dump volume 3

The accompanying Jam: https://youtu.be/EJEYqIHYBXs
Patience awoke deep within his nest of rags from a luxurious 6 hours of sleep. Today was the day. Just 1 more 15 hour grind deep in the MMR mines of Canada and he was making his escape. His team was ready, his knapsack packed, and there was nothing else to do but see it through. Patience stretched one last time, squirming into his burlap gitch and pinned his gleaming “Divine” medal to his tunic to begin his short walk to breakfast. He was so focused on the plan and what was to come, that he almost ruined everything before it began – by bumping into someone else, who then bumped into a 3rd person. In traditional Canadian culture the apology and “excuse me” circle could go on for hours, and Patience simply did not have that kind of time.
Tapping his shiny new Divine badge Patience excused himself from the circle, uttering apologies that his apology was not appropriately apologetic and that he must beg their forgiveness at a later date for his rudeness. Choruses of apologies at delaying him followed Patience down the hall, but he was back on his way after only a 6 minute delay. Entering the dining hall, Patience grabbed his tray of Poutine and a Timmy’s Coffee (double-double) and proceeded to join those in on the plan at the table. Just as he was about to dig in, Auto Attacks cleared his throat – “Patience eh, you forgot the prayer. Don’t need the Keeners knowing what we are aboot now”. That was 2 mistakes just this morning, Patience needed to get it together. “Sorry aboot that” mumbled Patience. Bending his head and clasping his hands he recited the rite of the Canadian - as he had every morning since arriving at the gulag. “Hail Gaben, full of grace, hallowed be your game. My queue be done, my MMR come, in US East as well as US West servers. Give us today my daily Poutine. And forgive us our feeds, as we forgive those who feed when partied with us. Lead us not into the ranks of the culled, but let us lead Canada to dota2 glory - Amen”.
Finishing his gravy covered sustenance, Patience bid his colleagues luck and hurried off to his training pod. His path took him passed the intake center where Patience glimpsed a pack of squalling new arrivals. The children’s ruddy and tear stained cheeks framed their red eyes and Patience could still see himself in that crowd. It was a hard fact of Canadian life, but if you were deemed unfit for Hockey success by the age of 5, you were dumped into the Dota2 mines by parents who had given up on you. If you were able to grind your way to Divine 5, you would be released and welcomed back into Canadian society with a two-four of Molson’s and a few apologies. If you couldn’t grind to the elite ranks of Dota 2, you were culled. It was as simple as that – or had been until now.
Now Patience had a 3rd option. By teaming up with Auto Attacks, Zamoxles, and Erock they could escape the mines. They would never follow the path of Unity or LaLa and escape on their own merits, but they would get out, and that’s all that mattered. Just one more grind to get through and they could make their play. Arriving at his training Pod Patience finished his Tim Hortons double-double and climbed in for a paltry 15 hour grind session.
Patience knew something was wrong when he was allowed a break after a mere 6 games, typically you got 1 break around the 8 hour mark whether you needed it or not. Climbing out of his pod he saw one of the keeners, Dark, traipsing down the hall holding Mertank by the arm. Dark as a divine 4/5 who played tier 2 competitively could have escaped, but chose to stay as part of the aristocracy. “Now now Mertank, there’s nothing to fear” drawled dark “we just want to discuss why you are still stuck down in legend – nothing to worry aboot”. At that moment both Dark and Mertank locked eyes with Patience and a grin grew across Darks face. “Oh Patience, we don’t need you…. Yet. Although now that I think of it, we may need to discuss that 3k party MMR. I was just walking Mertank down to talk to Gu3st, maybe after that eh?”. Patience’s mind raced - talk to... Gu3st? But Gu3st had been culled months ago. No…. He was going to cull Mertank! As dawning crashed across Patience face he began to step forward. “No” shouted Mertank. “Its fine. I was never any good on anything but centaur, no matter how much you coached me. All I had was my Centaur”. Patience climbed back in his pod, its all he could do. He would complete the session and then he was gone.
Meeting over their evening Poutine and Molson’s, Patience looked around at the waiting eyes of the team. “Are we ready”? Auto nodded, Zamo looked sick but still replied “Ready as I’ll ever be”, and Erock moved his trembling hand into a thumbs up. Well – Let’s do it lads. One deep breath and then pandemonium reigned supreme. “Il teach you to accuse me of fornicating with a goose” “Syrup sucking Hoosier!” “I’m not even sorry I hurt your feelings!” “you call that a Molson’s muscle? More like a Labatt lard lump” “Gretzky wouldn’t set those records into today’s NHL”. That did it – the final sin in Canadaland. The guards came down hard on the culprits and heaved Patience, Erock, Zamoxles, and Auto Attacks apart – simultaneously apologizing for interrupting their fun and beating them senseless.
When Patience came to he was in the black cells, just him and a goose. Just as he planned. Deftly dodging the pecks of that feathered demon, Patience went to the far right corner where the toilet connected to the wall. A corner mirrored in each of the 4 black cells. A corner where if all 4 pipes in all 4 corners were broken open, a body could slip through to the larger sewer pipes below. Excitement building, Patience began to tap out the passcode “Look at this photograph” – “Every time it makes me laugh” came the response. Good, Erock was in the cell to the right. A few more seconds passed and then “How did our eyes get so red” was tapped out to Patiences left. Then nothing. Where was Zamoxles? They needed all 4 to pull this off. “And what the heck is on Jimmy’s head!”. Finally the last verses of the venerable Nickelback came tapping through the walls. Time to execute.
Erock and Zamo began the melodious warbling’s of Justin Bieber to draw the guards attention as Patience and Auto Attacks waited. It only took 3 verses before the guards had joined in, how could they resist? Every time the guards belted out the word “Baby” Patience and Auto hit the waste pipe. It only took 4 renditions of the Bieber ballad before they were through. Time to switch it up. Patience and Auto now lured the guards into an Alanis Morrissett sing along as Erock and Zamo hacked through their portions. With the last dying lines of “Ironic”, the 4 slipped into the waste pipe and down to the sewers. Once in the sewers they each went their separate ways; the sewers twisted, turned and split without reason - it was every man for himself. I will spare my readers the grizzly details of the foul journey through Canadian sewers. Let’s just say that a steady diet of gravy, syrup, beer, bacon, and Nanaimo bars does not lead to a healthy digestive tract. Emerging into rain Patience dropped to his knees to let the water wash away the repulsive slurry of human waste and to baptize him to freedom.
submitted by Wcuprz1 to u/Wcuprz1 [link] [comments]


2018.02.27 23:51 efarayenkay [TOMT][Actor] Actor who learned his lines on live TV

I once read about an actor from way back when (I think it was back in the days before TV shows were pre-recorded) who was on his way to the studio to prepare for (and perform) a live televised segment about a car accident when, in something Alanis Morrissette would call irony, he was involved in a car accident himself on the way to the studio. Wasn't hurt, but he got to the studio so late that there was no time to learn his lines.
The solution was to write his lines on cards that would be shown to him to prompt him to speak (I'm also guessing this pre-dates, and perhaps even led to the invention of, teleprompters). Apparently he spent the entire segment looking over his co-stars' shoulders to see his next line. Legend has it that he loved the experience so much he never learned his lines again, and looking over his shoulder for his next line became part of his act.
submitted by efarayenkay to tipofmytongue [link] [comments]


2017.01.30 01:58 leftfieldgeek [22/m] I don't know what to do with my Friend With Benefits (FWB) [24/m].

So I'm a bisexual guy whose never been in a relationship that's never lasted more than 2 consecutive months. Since graduating university in June 2016 I was kinda floating about in a post-uni haze for a good few months. After a couple of months of random hook ups this guy messages me on Grindr, the next day I go to his place and we have fun.
He's funny and chill and totally my type (even though I don't like his hair and I think he smokes too much weed) and he proposes a FWB situation, but he says that in the past guys get too clingy (this kinda stuck with me as a red flag). We hang out for a month or two; we have sex, eat pizza, watch movies and I stay at his for the night a few times.
Then one day I made a joke about how he never listens to me cause he's always too stoned and then he sends me a text saying that I'm looking for something serious. I was kinda surprised, assured him I didn't, apologised for making him feel uncomfortable and left it at that.
A month goes by, I end up in a horrible job during this month and experience some pretty bad mental health stuff. Anyway after coming back from a night out I drunkenly open Grindr to see a big apology message from him saying that he feels like a dick and that if I want he would like to talk to me again.
Cut to me going round to his drunk a couple of nights later where we have really intimate sex, he's being super affectionate and wants to go to a concert with me. I make a joke about how he's essentially asking me on a date after accusing me of wanting a relationship. He tells me that he feels he was seeing his ex for way too long and that we were hanging out and being to intimate to just be FWB. I assure him that I was just looking for a cuffing buddy. We have some more sex. The next morning he keeps on cuddling me and being really intimate and in true Alanis Morrissette definition of Ironic I leave feeling like I do actually "like" him now.
Two days later I end up making out with him in a club on New Year's Eve and going back to his flat for an afterparty where I am embarrassingly drunk but I remember his flatmate saying "I've wanted to meet you because he says you're really nice and funny" (I have a photographic memory when it comes to praise). When I leave he makes me promise to text him when I get home safe and makes a joke about him being clingy.
He then goes back home (out of town) for over a week to see his family who he couldn't see at Christmas because of work, during which time I send nudes which he responds positively to. But when he gets back there seems to excuse after excuse, he doesn't text me when he says he will and eventually I ask him "Do you have a day in mind for meeting up?" which gets left on read.
I've spent the past few days listening to some sad songs, mainly by Kate Bush and now I feel better than I usually do after rejection.
Okay so if you've made it this far, well done (I wasn't sure how detailed to get). Now for my question: Should I send him a message to let him know that I think he's being rude and that he needs to grow up? Or should I just not message him at all and keep moving forward?
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
submitted by leftfieldgeek to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2016.09.18 23:26 DrSquibbles 20/F A Little Shy...

I'm not exactly sure what to put, but I guess I'm looking for someone really friendly and at least my age and supportive in Phoenix, AZ (any nearby cities is cool, too). Male or Female is fine, LGBT is fine too. I really don't care about your bedroom preferences, they're done in the bedroom for a reason. I have a LOT of interests like video games, snowboarding, horseback riding, exercising, just hanging out, trying new food, travel, studying foreign languages, etc. I unfortunately don't do the vast majority of these because I have no money atm, (literally waiting for my first check at my new job rn and even then I make min wage...) I'm actually pretty high energy when I'm comfortable and 100% being myself with people. Like, when my past friends had a sugar high they couldn't keep up with me. I'm typically really reserved about my personal stories because I haven't really felt comfortable enough with anyone here to tell them about myself deeply, and I've lived here for 5 years. Basically I haven't had any friends in 5 years... Very lonely. As a forewarning, I do have Depression/Anxiety and have been abused basically my whole life, so someone who is super supportive and willing to understand that sometimes I won't want to talk or I just want to listen. I also have mild dyslexia so be prepared for some typos here and there, (and if we text, just know that my phone's autocorrect sometimes is ridiculous and changes words like "was" into "Washington"). I also try to text back as fast as i can, but if I'm not busy these days I'm usually hibernating to keep troubling thoughts at bay, (not healthy, but meh I need my rest when I can get it...) It's hot af here, but I actually would like to get outside and hang out with people I genuinely enjoy. Even if it's something as simple as teaching me to skateboard, I just need companionship right now. I would actually really like for someone who has a lot of interesting stories to talk to me, because I actually do enjoy listening just as much as I enjoy sharing, (if not more). As for humour, I'm a fairly open-minded and very intelligent person. Am I the world's biggest genius? Hell no not even close. But if you want some geek to teach you random science stuff, I'm your gal. I can laugh at most jokes, even dark humour, but typically if ll I hear are racist jokes I start to get turned-off because they tend to be cheap and built on others' internal prejudices. Memes are cool, funny memes are better, if you must know my favorite jokes, they are pun jokes. Even "dad jokes" can make me wet myself laughing, I'm that weak to pun jokes lol. I actually would really appreciate someone who could increase my confidence and introduce me to some new hobbies and even new people who are super cool, as I kinda wanna be social like I was as a kid, (I was a VERY social child, albeit forced. Laughed a lot, never truly happy, but I knew how to talk to people. Lost that skill as I became more and more disgusted with the world around me and started to slink away and try to exist in shadows observing other people and basically keeping everyone else shut out). I'm VERY open, so I can talk about literally damn near anything, (I have yet to run into a topic I wish to avoid with anyone I'm comfortable with). I actually talk about sex very openly, so if you find that to be a taboo subject you definitely shouldn't talk to me and if you also consider any sort of speech in reference to sex as a sexual advance, you even moreso shouldn't talk to me because I can guarantee you that they are not. If you're someone who likes to discuss controversial topics, that's perfectly fine as long as you are mature enough to do so in a respectable manner. I don't mind sharing ideas at all, but pretending you are superior or that you're right all the time simply based on your own and others' opinions just doesn't make any sense to me. Just be logical with the argument you propose. My music taste ranges pretty vividly, I can listen to almost anything. The only "music" I can't stand is Alannis Morrissette, and quite frankly words cannot express how much I despise her voice. Her screeching is the bane of my existence and I'd much rather listen to Justin Bieber on loop for 3 hours than to 2 seconds of any of her songs. Typically I listen to metal, but I do revisit my roots and listen to older hip-hop/R&B songs, (because the newer music is actually cheap garbage and I don't meant that in a "I don't like change" kind of way, I mean it in the sense that they only talk about drugs, promiscuity, money, and illegal behaviors like it's supposed to be "cool" or something,) every once in a while. I love animals, but I'm more of a dog person. I don't mind cats or cat people, but I have a VERY severe allergy to cats so I can't be around them or their hair as a result. I can go into anaphylactic shock and die, but so far usually my windpipe just shuts tightly and I seize a little if I even so much as smell a cat. People recommend medicine, but quite frankly I'm not taking medicine 365 days/yr for an occurrence that will happen less than 20 days/yr. Almost never around cats so no need for the meds. I do like to talk about guys a lot, so if you think talking about hot guys/guys you'd bang/guys you've dated/guys you'd like to date is annoying, no point in talking to me once again because that basically goes hand-in-hand with my constant sex talk. I actually have a crush on someone that I work with and I'm kinda looking for advice on that, tho I'm hyper-analytical so I'm constantly re-evaluating my chances with him on a daily basis. You don't have to be the world's fastest textemessenger to talk to me, but within 5 minutes if you aren't at work or something is ideal. I try to text back that fast, but frequently instead of actually typing the message, I just think the reply in my head and don't send anything at all, even tho I have internally responded to your message, (sorry lol). Another thing is that I'm highly critical, (though also highly affectionate,) and I don't sugarcoat things, so if you can't stand any sort of criticism or blatant truths don't waste your time with me. I won't ever say something just to spite you/hurt you/offend you, but like I said I don't sugarcoat things so much of the time it may feel like I am. Sorry if I typed way too much, I just wanted to be as precise as possible about what I'm looking for. I'm doubting this will get very many replies (if any at all...) but hopefully I'll find very nice people. Thanks for reading this far if you put up with my BS, haha!
EDIT: Sorry if you sent a message and I didn't send anything back. I received too many and can't reply to them all. Thank you for responding everyone! :D
It really helped a lot
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2012.07.09 22:29 manicmortician A Razor to a Beard

I certainly was not planning to write about Taylor Swift today. But EW.com is running an essay so objectionable and off-base that it demands a rebuttal.
Lanford Beard, a usually innocuous and occasionally erudite EW blogger, posted a piece (here's the link --- http://popwatch.ew.com/2012/07/07/katy-perry-taylor-swift-music-mean-girls/) sensationally announcing that "Taylor Swift and Katy Perry are music's mean girls." (It's part of EW.com's long dormant Contrarian Corner series.) In it, she (yes, Beard is female --- else, I'd just dismiss it as straight-up gynophobia) expresses reservations over the "massive success" these two women have derived from "crucifying their exes publicly." Beard is more diplomatic than the headline suggests, and a few of her points are indeed valid.
But not enough: overall, the article is grossly misguided. Of the many elephants crowding its room, the biggest is that, within modern pop music, castigating exes is a standard trope. Many rock and roll deities --- Lennon, Jagger, Dylan, Costello, Billy Joel --- frequently vilified their failed pursuits, and often womanhood as a whole, in language every bit as scathing as that of the essay's subjects. In more modern terms, Jack White, Kanye West, and James Murphy constantly resort to nasty swipes at the women who fail them, and are usually rewarded with critical plaudits. Hell, the emo wave, which only ebbed about five years ago, was rife with vicious girl-hate. To single out two females for "wallowing in [romantic ugliness] for personal and financial gain," i.e. doing what male rockers have done for at least a half-century, presents a foolish double standard.
Beard would be wise to consider the following quote: "Sometimes the complaints about the men who have failed her sound petulant, but the appearance of petulance is one of the prices of liberation." That is, of course, Robert Christgau, writing about Joni Mitchell (who Swift may soon portray on the big screen) forty years ago. Yet the only historical context Beard offers is Alanis Morissette's "You Oughta Know," a hit song about an ill-advised foray with a sleazy celebrity, one that employs language far more graphic than anything Swift or Perry would offer. Beyond noting how Morrissette's vitriol branded her an angsty rocker chick (Beard actually uses the term badass...no, really...to describe Alanis...badass), and forgetting that it was a forceful rebranding of a once Perry-esque pop princess, Beard doesn't really go anywhere with the Alanis comparison, and quickly switches points, leaving her post both myopic and ahistorical.
It's also ignorant of Swift's catalog, latching onto what is primarily a media-fueled simplification of her very complex persona, one that Swift cannily indulges and (on Speak Now, at least) cleverly skewers. Beard makes the following point: "Sure, Carrie Underwood, Miranda Lambert, and Martina McBride (to name a few) have all had a vengeful hit or two about no-good men. Taylor Swift has made a career on them." An image, possibly. But not a career. Of Swift's first three hits --- the wistful "Tim McGraw," the lovesick "Teardrops on My Guitar," the giddy "Our Song" --- none call out "no-good men" in a vengeful manner. It was only after establishing her name that she released "Picture to Burn" and "Should've Said No" as singles, and neither netted the pop crossover success of her debut triad, or Underwood's similarly themed "Before He Cheats." In fact, none of Swift's signature radio hits excoriates an ex --- however, she does excoriate herself for mistreating an ex on one such hit ("Back to December").
Beard guesses that "nearly every track on Speak Now...[issues] emotional hits against her lovers done wrong." Horseshit. At most, only six of its fourteen tracks lash out at former lovers, and that's including "Mean" and "Innocent," neither of which is thought to depict a romantic encounter, and "Better Than Revenge," which disses the girl who stole her lover. Subtract those, and we're down to three, less than a quarter of Speak Now's tracks. Hardly the work of someone "us[ing] her guitar as a pitchfork and her voice as a torch to lead a musical witchhunt." Fans who know Swift as something more than a tabloid fixture know that vindictive break-up songs are only one element of her songwriting ouevre. Because she's such a masterful songwriter, those break-up songs are powerfully resonant, as are her songs about the happier sides of romance. In an article that questions Swift's ability to empower her audience, Beard relies on a vision of Swift that is fundamentally reductive, one that minimizes both her talents and her achievements.
I cannot speak as authoritatively on Katy Perry, as I loathe her. She is not without talent: though galaxies from the songwriting maestro that Swift is, she can write serviceable pop trifles, such as "Teenage Dream" and "Long Shot," the song she wisely donated to Kelly Clarkson. But she can't perform them worth a goddamn: her real-life Betty Boop schtick is regressive and often intolerable. Beard's argument that Katy Perry is a "mean girl" is based almost exclusively on her recent hit "Part of Me," clearly inspired by her divorce from Russell Brand, despite Perry's vehement denials (the kind of denials Swift is too savvy to issue). It's a totally average song, with none of the linguistic alacrity that buoys Swift, but its bitterness is earned: it's about Russell Brand, who is a total skeez and a temperamental jackass. Though accounts of their split exist only through gossip and hearsay, most produce something once thought impossible: sympathy for Katy Perry. Because Brand's outlandish rock star act is not much of an act at all, he seems to have assumed that Perry was actually a sharp-tongued floozy, not some devout Christian hiding behind a profitable gimmick.
"Part of Me," is like Swift's "Dear John," a very public account of a very public break-up. Both are aimed at incurable playboys, each a decade older than his respective pop-star arm candy, and each known for boorish, monstrous behavior in and out of relationships. For god's sake, "Dear John" was aimed at a guy who thought jamming with ?uestlove licensed him to use racial slurs. Both songs plead naivete, innocence, even stupidity at falling for said guy's smarmy charm. Yes, there is resentment in both songs, but there is also self-flagellation, and ultimately, resilience. Beard disregards that these songs are not just slam jobs; they wouldn't be nearly as effective if they were. They are tales of triumph against men who mistreated the singers, against men who viewed women as conquests, against the kind of men that just about every girl encounters (and most fall for) at some point in her life.
Beard also takes umbrage with how these songs name names, which is a nonsensical grievance. Perry was involved with one man for two years, and we all know who that man is. She would not be able to write a break-up song without critics and bloggers assuming it's about Russell Brand. Ditto Taylor Swift. She can't go on a single date without landing in Us Weekly. Aside from "Dear John," few of her songs specifically name famous exes. But as she learned with "Forever and Always," pundits will play a "guess the ex" game no matter what she does --- she may as well embrace it, and even have some fun with it. For Beard to say that "Adele's M.O. feels different, less tawdry, if only because she has steadfastly refused to name the man who spurned her" is cheap and tacky, because Adele's ex is not famous, and Adele was not famous, certainly not Taylor Swift famous, at the time of that relationship. It's an off-base comparison because Swift and Perry are playing in a different sphere, and therefore by different rules. (And honestly, the lack of specificity, of vividness, of detail in Adele's lyrics is part of what makes her so bland --- she is verbally reticent, prone to cliched metaphors that she hopes her powerhouse vocals can overcome, but they rarely do.) That said, you don't necessarily have to be famous for your break-up to be public: Swift and Perry are in part reflecting the times, where you can tell hundreds or thousands of people that your ex is a prick simply by thumbing two buttons on your phone.
Further showcasing the carelessness of her rant, Beard devotes an entire paragraph to how the two divas claim to be both opponents and victims of bullying, but she can't quite problematize this stance. She neglects that both girls' debut albums contain some gay-unfriendly lyrics. In "Picture to Burn," Taylor Swift threatens to retaliate against her ex telling his friends she's obsessive by telling her friends he's gay. The lyric was deleted from later printings of her album, and she no longer performs that line live. However, I've often suspected this has more to do with cowardice than conviction, less Springsteen dropping the word "fairies" from "Lost in the Flood," more T-Swizzle worried about five-year-olds asking mommy what gay means. That she also excised the word "damn" from "Teardrops on My Guitar" supports the latter notion. For her part, Perry built her name on two singles both fascinated and repulsed by gayness. On "Ur So Gay," she uses the term as an insult, telling an effeminate lover that he's "so gay and you don't even like boys." After that, she exploded with "I Kissed a Girl," deflecting the boast by hoping her boyfriend didn't mind it, as if he would. Hell, even "Hot and Cold" tells some guy that "you PMS like a bitch." Surely, these better support a precarious identification with bullying than a song like "Mean," with its poignant overtones of schoolyard and domestic abuse. (Beard also misquotes "Mean": she claims that Swift wishes her foes to feel "like nothing...pathetic and alone in life." But she never explicitly wishes her enemy to feel "like nothing"; she instead says in the first verse that said enemy has "got [her] feeling like a nothing.")
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2011.06.11 20:24 wallace_wells Calliopeia's female singers mix

So over a month ago Calliopeia and I agreed to do a trade. It was my first time, so I wasn't entirely sure what to expect, but I got a lovely package of great comics when I did Secret Santa last year, so I thought I'd give it a try!
I'm more of a lurker on reddit so Calliopeia didn't have much to go on. Luckily for him, I have a soft spot for female singers so this CD was right up my street! Unluckily for him, I signed up for the exchange just as a month of some of the toughest exams of my life began so it's taken me absolutely ages to get round to sending off my own mix and writing this up. Sorry Calli! (Also, I am writing this while heavily hungover so apologies if some bits fail to make sense.)
Thanks so much Calliopeia, and I hope you enjoy my CD!
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